Monday, December 15, 2008

Temporarily closed again


this blog will be closed till a date tat wud be informed later. As the blog owner will be undergoing a bilateral cystectomy ( not a TAHBSO eh, thank GOD!).. am not sure how long will she recuperate, but she hopes that she wud be able to start her day again before the semester starts (tgh gigih berkobar2 nak berbakti kepada anak bangsa nih). Just wish her a speedy recovery ya! and back to her oldself again.. hope the surgeons wont leave any scissors inside her womb hihihih...
and one more thing.. forgive all her wrong doings so tat she cud be peacefully pushed to the OT without any hindrance.

Sunday, December 14, 2008

Its a boring weekend. seseorang had his gout attack again and that has left him, ermm being disabled for a while.Hence I had no one to bark at ( seemed cruel la plak if i were to bark at helpless person.. anyway all these boredom has made me look upon myself for a while..ala-ala muhasabah diri la plak, wuteva!)
cam bosan la plak nak update blog ni...its only 10 in the morning... and i m restless already..have some chores to be done at the back of my mind...but cik procrastination is dominating me again...tengok la camna,,..
to be continued--

Thursday, December 04, 2008

4499F Lorong Tok G*ading

tetiba plak rasa gigih nak meng-updatekan blog.. sementelah tghari karang makcik akan balik ke kg halaman yg tercinta ...besh besh beshh amat
maka seminggula makcik akan bersiaran drpd lorong tok gading... (tidak.. makcik tidak akan memnawa balik sebarang unsur2 yg boleh di internetkan di sana.. sementelah internet telah pun di'potong' oleh adik ku yg tercinta sejak bbrp bulan lalu (kerana mengikut katanya.. "line phone dlm bilik tu takder sapa guna" .. tapi.. oh ye.. internet masih lagik ada.. tapi cuma mode 'dial-up' sajork dan harus menggunakan line phone rumah nan satu yg ada kat hall tu... tak best la kan?
dan harus juga.. kalau mencari2 line wifi sesat di sekitar area rumah makcik tu.. mustahil rasanya sbb yg makcik tahu.. hanya makcik sorang jek yg internet tak brp savvy kat situ kahkahkah..
alaaa.. kat kws rumah makcik tu, hanya dipenuhi dgn budak2 yg main galah panjang sajork.. manakan tahu savvy se bagai nih.. hihiih..
lain la kalau mat-mat fit yg berlambak semunyi dalam semak on d way to masjid tu.. sambil2 nunggu mangsa, sempat berinternet menggunakan line telekomunikasi segala bagai dgn handphone masing2 kan?
hahaha... makcik ini cuba memperkotak-katikkan keupayaan org2 kampung makcik rupanyaa.. cessssss.. dasar lupa daratan..
Arakiannya, cuti makcik akan bermula sekejap lagi sebaik sahaja makcik menaiki pesawat kunang-kunang itu ( taktau la.. boleh ke panjat tangga nak naik neyh.. last time makcik dibantu oleh anak sedara).. sehingga la ke hari rabu depan..
bahwasanya.. makcik terlupa la pulak hari khamis adalah hari cuti keputeraan sultan selangor.. ( kalau tau.. makcik memang akan balik pada hari tersebut) .. tapi memandangkan nasik sudah menjadi bubur McD, makcik abaikan sahaja hari tersebut dan bertekad untuk melepak-lepak dirumah sahaja..
Sempena hariraya haji yg bakal menjelang isnin depan.. makcik telah menanamkan azam untuk tidak melakukan perkara2 berikut sewaktu di kampung halaman:
1. berdiri dengan jarak kurang dr 3 meter dengan sebarang lembu yg ditambat di mana2 pokok pada hari isnin, selasa atau rabu depan ( oppss.. rabu makcik sudah balik)
2. duduk mengadap sebarang hidangan berasaskan daging di meja makan rumah makcik atau rumah org lain.
3. bermain-main dengan sebarang ekor lembu yang ditambat atau yg berkeliaran sepanjang tempoh tersebut
4. berkeluh kesah ditepi sebraang fridge yang diisi dengan aiskrim
5. meninggalkan house slipper di depan pintu bilik air ( kerana dikhuatiri akan di kebas oleh si daniel sebagai alat untuk membals dendam kepada makcik dikemudian hari. (dah beberapa kali makcik telah dibaling dengan selipar oleh budak Daniel kerana makcik asyik menyuruhnya melakukan aksi tarian gelek dihadapan makcik)... ye budak kecik itu sebnarnya adalah pendendam orangnya.. dan biasanya dia memulakan strategi yang tak diduga sewaktu makcik senang enak bersantai di atas sofa kat hall)
6. menukar pakaian sewaktu budak kecik itu berada di dalam bilik.. kerana dikhuatiri beliau akan mengutuk kaw-kaw punya akan bentuk badanku yg solid molid ini.. (kali terakhir beliau mengutuk makcik sewaktu makcik tak sempat menghalau beliau keluar bilik ialah pada raya puasa lepas.. dan perkataan yang maha pedas yang digunakan ketika itu ialah " ya Allah.. besarnya perut"! hahahaa.. hampir makcik nak terkencing mendengarkan kutukan mahabrata itu)
7. tidak menjejakkan kaki ke kedai tudung di tingkat 1 pasar besar lama ( ishh tapi dalam hati kepingin sungguh utk membeli 2-3 helai tudung yang ekslusif itu)

Itu sahaja rasanya resolusi yang perlu dipatuhi sepanjang berada di kg halaman nanti.. waima.. sebaik sahaja makcik balik ke bumi serdang kembali.. makcik harus bersiap sedia untuk berumahtangga di hospital lagik...The big O-day cuma tinggal 2 minggu sahaja lagik..
owh.. tidak sabar rasanya utk melantak segala nasik kerabu yang berwarna hitam... dan juga sebarang ubi rebus.. ya.,.. itu merupakan makanan ruji makcik sebaik sahaj tinggal di kampung halaman..
lihat.. tidak susah hendak membela dan menyara makcik ini sebenarnya.. sekadar di gula-gulakan dengan ubi kayu rebus sahaja, maka makcik akan terlentok keseronokan.. dan sekelongsong nasi belauk yg beruilam sambal belacan dan gulai kuning ikan kering.. waduhhh udah kecur airliur makcik ini...tidak mustahil sidaniel akan kembali dengan kutukan2 dewatanya lagi.. sebaik sahaja melihat makcik mengisi tembolok makcik yg mengikut kata daniel " ya Allah.. perut Cik Ngah macam perut gajah!" hahhahahah

Tuesday, December 02, 2008

Takder mood nak berkerja aka nak memproduktifkan diri sementelah dah dekat2 nak raya aji nih ( haha alasan.. bila masanya ko ada mood nak kije pun makcik.. excusessss manjang ko neyh)..
serious... tambahan pula minggu nih.. semua org either pi mengkursus ptk-an diri or dah balik cuti..
cam makcik sensorang jek yg masuk kije kat dalam dunia nih...
cam makcik sorang jek yg takde plan nak bawak anak2 pi mana2 sempena musim cuti nih ( hishh lupa, anak pun lum ado)..
cam oksigen pun dapat kat makcik jek dalam ofis nih.. ( explained pasai sejuk sgt aircond 2-3 hari nih.. sbb takramai yg guna..)
tapi takpe...
sebabnya.. esok lusa.. makcik akan men-cutikan diri.. dengan bersuka ria makan nasik kerabu, apam balik, nasik berlauk segala bagai kat kampung halaman yg tercenta...
walaupun makcik amat paham.. chances makcik nak berpoya2 di bawah terik mentari amatlah tipis.. sebab kg halam makcik skrg tgh musim tengkujuh...
tapi makcik redhaa... ( hari tu tengok mangsa banjir moyok jek kat pusat pemindahan banjir, makcik ter-pilu sat.. iya la.. ada gak makcik terpikir.. kenapa la mereka mereka semua yg dah tau.. tempat dorang tu setahun sekali akan dilimpahi air banjitr tapi tetap nak duk situ gak.. apasal tak pindah or buat rumah kat tempat yg tinggi skit ( dan selepas itu makcik mula la mengutuk2 diri sendiri..ish cam senang jek suh org pindah randah duk tempat tinggi.,.. dah namanya tu tempat tumpah darah dia.. ingat ke senang ke nak pi duk tempay lain , lain la makcik yg rumah tak penah banjir unless kalau di takdirkan tempat makcik banjir.. alamaknya mmg bandar KB tu akan tenggelamm.. )
begitulah kekdahnya...
Sebab itu la.. makcik tak gedik or hepi sngt kunnunya nak main air bah ke hapa ke.. sbab makcik tau banjir ni merupakan satu malapetaka kepada setengah org yg tinggal di kawasan rendah.. ilang segalanya.. (tapi ada la plak maknusia yg excited gila kalau banjir sbb nak main air banjir katenyaaa.. siap wat lagu lagi.. ishh... heran la plak)..
ala-ala ceramah ustazah la plak neyh..
tengok keadaan mangsa banjir bergenang jek airmata makcik.. ish kalau la makcik nih diberi rezeki yg lebih.. nak gak makcik beli tanah yg tak sampai dek banjir n bagi mangsa banjir tu bina rumah bagai kat situ...so takder la dorang asal ujung tahun jek.. dorang phobia takut rumah kena banjir....
tapi tu la.. makcik tak kayo.. tanah sekangkang kero pun takder..
begitulah adanya..

Friday, November 28, 2008

Ada aku kesahhhh?

Pagi jumaatyang sejuk . Hujan tak henti-henti sejak petang semalam. jeans yg kat ampaian tu dah berapa kali kering dah berapa kali lembab der. Iya lah.. aku balik time ujan lebat menggila.. ada aku kesahhh? hehehe
Minggu ni cam tak produktif jek ( tah masa bila la plak aku ni produktif kan?) tambah-tambah semenjak bebudak nih takder... asal jek aku baca artikel kat journal skit.. taksampai spoloh menet.. mula la menguap bagai.. tapi time duk nak mengkhatamkan blog si Joe tuh... buntang jek bijik mata aku bacanya.. cam baca buku citer yg tak sabar2 kita nak tau ending dia camna.. ishh mid-lfe crisis betul la aku neyh... kekekek
Tapi berkat kesungguhan dan ke-dedikasian aku baca .. akhirnya malam tadi.. khatam la jugak aku blog mamat tu yg dah masuk tahun keempat tuh. bayangkan la... dalam satu bulan tu berpuluh2 entries dia post.. aku boleh abiskan baca dalam 1 jam. ishhh cam addicted la plak aku neyh.. kekeke
tapi dah khatam nih... rasa cam .. dah takder benda to look fwd to.. (walaupun kije yg menimbun atas meja aku makin lama makin byk.. list task tuh siap tampal lagik tuhh,,, kay screen pc.. tapi dari 2 minggu lepas aku rasa cam 1% jek yg aku buat... ada aku kesahhhh? kekekek)
Sementelah plak.. darjah kenestapan aku dah makin menurun.. fome wat may... entrie blog makosea yg menyakitkan ati ke.. aku malassssssss dah nak ambik port... aku nih kan.. dah nama nya piscean... memang la org bawah horoskop nih jenis yg suka hold grudges kan? yg ala-ala jenis menyimpan dendam kesumat ( simpan dendam jek.. takder la nak balas dendam pun.. ) so pasal maknoshea yg caKap dia tak buat apa2 salah pun kat aku.. yg apa yg dia tulis tu semua nya betul.. yg rasa apa yg terbetik dia otak dia tu.. dia boleh luahkan tanpa kira perasaang org lain.. yg dia rasa yg dia tu la besttt sgt.. yg rasa apa2 menda pun mesti go thru dia dulu sbb dia tu 'berkepentingan' orgnya... go on laa... sebab semenjak ssat aku dah baca apa yg dia tulis pasal aku yg aku nih maknoshea yg complicated sgttt. yg dia rasa dia nak kongsi ke-complicated-an aku ngan pembaca2 yg suka tulis komen kat blog dia.. teruskan lah perjuangan suci dia tu.. ada aku kesahhhhhh? yg penting.. aku dah tau apa impression dia kat aku... ( aku pun leh gak nak menyuarakan ketidakpuasan hati aku kat dia selama nih.. ) tapi aku diamkan jek lah... sebab bila berkawan nih.. prinsip aku senang jek.. ko sakit hati kat dia.. ko tak suka certain habits dia.. ko simpan jek ladalam ati...ko terima la dia seadanya.. ko tego dia dgn cara baik in person.. (takmain la sms or YM haprak tuh... sbb aku nih bukannya idup bergantung kat YM kan?)tidaklah aku nak bertegang leher thru sms lagi pun.. apa yg dia pikir tu betul or bagus.. teruskanlah.. sebabnya.. aku dah malas nak ambik port lagik..... dulu ada gak aku terpk kan maknosea2 yg penah jadik kawan aku tapi skrg... aku pikir diri sendiri jek la.. dan orang2 yg ada di samping aku bila aku memerlukan tanpa aku perlu meng-inform dorang yg aku nih sakit ke.. taklalu makan ke.. jatuh dalam bilik air ke... cam.. cam yg Joe kata.. org yg 'connected' ngan aku jek..senang cam tuh...
(cam nak menyentapz lagik jek entri ni.. hehehe)
idok la.. aku dah pendam menda nih dah lama.. tapi being me.. aku selalu buat endah tak endah jek ngan perasaan yg berkecamuk dlm otak aku nih.. some more, i have other things to worry about.. cam idup aku nih yg terumbang-ambing... in terms of my health.. Bukannya aku tak ingat waktu riang ria cuti skolah ngan maknosea2 yg bergelar 'kawan' aku satu ketika dulu.. but as time goes by.. aku semakin tua.. ada masanya aku mmg nak berseronok jek.. ala-ala merambu la kunun.. tapi skrg.. waima nak ke rumah abg aku masa weekend pun aku malas...aku lebih tennag duk kat rumah.. lepak kat sofa sambil duk tukar2 tukar channel astro tuh 5 minit skali.. kengkadang aku punya la malasnya.. sanggup makan apa yg ada kat dalam rumah jek drpd turun bawah belik nasik.. perasaan nak bersosial ngan orang tuh dah takder dah dalam idup aku tuh dah hilang sedikit demi sedikit.. aku nih kira bersosial la gak.. bersosial kat tempat kije.. sembang ngan 2 org kolig aku yg maha prihatin dan penyayang tuh.. cukup lah bagik aku.. ada maknosea yg hantar dan ambik aku kije hari2.. abg2 aku , adik2 aku.. itu pun dah ckup la bagik aku.. i dun need more.. apa yg ada kat sekeliling aku tuh pun aku dah bersyukur.. aku dah tak perlukan.. kawan2 berkaraoke ke.. kawan2 yg huha huha satu waktu dulu.. as Im not getting any younger some more... kira aku ni dah melalu satu transition period.. and im nearer to a fullstop.. so apa aku nak pikir lagi.. selain mengenang nasib diri and try not to whine much.. kekekeke...
arakian makanya... aku dah sebulat suara.. cuba untuk meng-ignorekan segala perasaan yg tak enak di kepala aku... aku taknak wat musuh sebenarnya.. tapi kalau aku dah sentapz.. korang ingat senang ke aku nak wat biasa balik ngan org yg menyebabkan sentapz aku tuh? hehehehehe....
yg lebih senang.. ko abaikan jek maknosea2 yg macam tu,, get on with yr life.. dan hapuskan lah memori2 daun pisang tu...
(bukannya aku takpenah buat pun cam tu... org yg aku dah taknak ingat.. sampai namanya pun aku erase kat dalam otak aku ni tau).. yeah yeah.. i know.. its not a noble thing to do tho.. tapi.. ada aku kesahhhh ekekeke?
ces... dlu beriya cakap taknak blog ni jadi saluran untuk meluahkan perasaan terpendam aku.. haaaaa.. kan aku dah cakap.. aku ni kadang2 jek boleh dipercayai kekekeek
Bukanya aku tak penah kecik ati ngan 'socalled friends' aku tuh dulu.. sbb aku ada lak gak beruasaha utk mengeruhkan yg jernih.. tapi kalau dah a few attempts pun failed.. malas der aku nak try agik.. as i believed time will heal the past.. tapi kalau dah nak heal tu.. ko ungkinkan isu lain yg takpenah aku terpikir pun... impossible la tak sentapz kan.,.. sbb aku nih... nak sentapz tgk keadan jek.. cam kalau ko duk tgh jalan berlenggang tapi ada org yg pegi tahan kaki kununnya nak bergurau.. pas tu ko jatuh... boleh ke ko nak senyum pas tu cakap kat org tu.. 'takpe.. aku suka.. ko wat la lagik.. aku suka cara ko gurau tu... aku takpe2.. in fact aku need that.. gurau yg menyebabkan lutut ko berdarah2 sebab itu akan menydarkan aku yg aku nih ghopa2nya ada kawan yg aku dah lama lupakan.. " boleh cam tu?hahahah
(malas der aku nak mention pasal sentap nih).. sebab kalau betul la firasat aku.. aku seboleh2nya taknak simpan menda cam ni lama2... ko dah sentap.. time tuu gak ..ko kuarkan.. pas tu dah.. jgn la nak pi korek2 yg lama tuh.. pas tu mention lagi 3-4 bulan kemudian.. ).. ish cakap taknak mention lagi word sentaps tu...
Dah le kan?
Itu la.. kengkadang aku rasa bagus lagik kawan ngan lelaki.. apa yg dorang tak gemar kat aku.. cakap terus terang... kalau aku sentapz (ish tercakap lagik) pun.. time tu jek la.. tapi kurang2nya aku boleh la try to improvise myself.. ataupun ko tanyakan ke.. apsal aku wat cam tu ke.. daripada duk assume bagai.. pas tu publish kat blog hahahaha... ( eh kalau aku sendiri ckp.. takpe.. ni to 'read' it from someone else.. yg aku anggap kawan.. pas tu the way org tu tulis ... ( memang la ko rasa takder salahnya ngan ayat tu. tapii kalau ko ada kat tempat aku.. tambah plak dgn hati kristal aku nih hahahah... baca dgn intonasi aku.. nampak sgt ayat tak ok tu jadik cam kutukan terang2an.. pas tu ada plak komen dari tah sapa2 yglangsung tak kenal aku.. .. come on la.. i can take critics ok.. tapi inh person la.. bukan nya kat dlm forum ( ishh nak sentap lagik ke nihhh)
eh tak leh nak sambung lagi dah...sesi gossip kat phone lak..

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Uish tak sepatutnya aku post entry sbb akunya resolusi menjelang tahun baru ni ( yang ku rasa cam nak start mulai dr sekarang le kan) ialah mengepos entri paling byk pun 2 entries/week. Boleh kan?
Sebbanya aku ni kan.. time aku rasa cam penuh jek kpala otak aku mengarang ayat2 yg sedap didengar oleh diri aku sendiri, time tu la aku tgh nak terbongkang atas katil nak lelap.. dan sementelah aku ni bukannya a 'natural writer', idok la aku bingkas bangun dan terus cari pen dan kertas ka, laptop ke hapa ka utk menyimpan segala intipati yg tetiba jek terukir dgn bagusnya kat kpala otak aku nih...
sebaliknya aku terus jek tido.. dgn tagline-esok2 la aku poskan .. ( kalau la aku masih boleh ingat apa yg aku nak tulis)..
nampak sgt aku nih bukan seorang blogger tegar kan?
tapiiiiiiiiii.. semenjak 2-3 hari ni.. aku dah ter'hooked' with satu blog ni... tu pun aku came across the blog bila aku bloghopping kat list blog si pakcik shahe... aku biasanya jadi slient reader jek kat mana2 blog yg aku baca n usually aku takkan pegi blog yg sama lebih dr 3 kali.. tu pun still aku bloghopping dr llist blog pakcik tu ha,,
tapi tis time around.. tetiba aku terus 'tersangkut' kat blog tu.. aku baca dr first entry yg ada kat situ which started a few years back.. sekarang aku baru abis baca previous entries yg dipos masa bulan April 2005... satu malam leh la aku baca ( dgn speed readingnya) previoeus posts-nya selama 2 bln gitu...
so nak aku habiskan sampai post terkini tu.. aku tatau la brp belas malam lagik aku nak kena bersengkang mata and 'burning d midnite oil" -makin rabun la aku pas ni..
ishh.. kalah zaman aku buat tesisi doctorate aku dulu tu ha....
tapi seriously... aku suka the way he wrote it... the way he narrated dianya susah payah struggling kat bumi amerika tu.. i cud imagine dat...
bila dia post conversations dia with his sister kat ICQ tuh.. aku pun turut sama ber-emosi.. sambil menituskan ayaqmata...
dan byk menda kat dalam entries dia tu.. aku rasa nak quote bcos somehow aku bleh rasa..ada gak yg kena kat btg idung aku...
pokoknya ... (ridwan) bak kata ustaz aku yg bermama ridzwan dlu tuh. aku mmg dah addicted la baca blog tu.. and last nite aku duk pulun baca dr kul 8 sampai kul 12 malam... dan hasilnya... aku duk mimpi aku kat bumi amerika gak.. sama cam blog tuh... hahaha gila ke hapa ko nih macik...
so hari ni aku kurangkan la masa bacaan aku.. aku stop kul 10.. sbb aku taknak la mimpi aku duk amerika lagik malam ni... sbb hajatnya aku ingat aku nak mimpi aku ada kat paris ke, rome ke.. malam ni.. (bley?)...
iya la.. abis, time kije aku taknak la baca blog dia.. sbb aku ni kan.. kalau dah menarik ati sgt tu.. drag la plak masa yg aku seppatutnya buat kije tapi aku gunakan utk baca blog... curi tulang belakamgnamanya tu... !
tapi idak le aku nafikan.. aku pun ada gak post entries masa kije tapi itu la.. ingatnya nak tulis barang sebaris dua ayat jek.. tetapi.. haa cam entri ni la.. berje;a2 la plak aku menyambungnya...
aku tak linkkan pun blog dia kat blog aku ni.. sbbnya aku dah hapal pun url dia...
so.....aku masuk tido dulu la yek... cammm.. bosan jek kan entri aku nih kan.. byk2 citer yg menarik berlaku.. ini jek yg aku buleh tulis? tak sglamer langsung kan...
memangg!
dah... malam ni aku ingat nak mimpi naik emirates pi dubai ler.. ada kat blog mana tah.. aku intai dia cakap dianya dream place ialah dubai sana tuhh...
ishh aku dah black list dubai tuh.. esp airport dia yg tak semengah tuh... ( aku rasa ada tulis dlm prev entries)... mmg aku dah black list dubai airport tuhh....ptuih...(tak relevannya tetiba aku mention pasal dubai ni plak)
tetiba nak emo.... ish complicated aku nih....
p.s tetiba teringat something abt complicated thingy kat blog yg aku ikuti tuh... ada something ygdia tulis yg aku rasa nak quote kat sini.. tapi aku dah lupa entry bulan brapa.. --nyelasal tak bookmark kan.. ishh
selamat malam malaysia....

Friday, November 14, 2008

Mood sedikit mencanak ( hishh cam lucah le plak kan, 'term' ni)..
alkesahnya.. aku wat kije skit2 je sementelah rasa cam guilltyy la sgt datang kije tak wat kije.. apa kelas kann... baikkkkk la balik rumah basuh baju guling2 atas sofa ke cam tu...
Dgn mood yg masih lagi cam anak kucing nyaris2 kena gelek ngan merc....
tepat kul 12, aku kuarkan jajan yg aku beli kat 7-E pagi tadi...
mula2 bukak peket asam... makan seketui dua.. pas tu...
bukak peket kacang lak...
ehhh lupa nak cakap.. masih lagi dlm mode kecik ati yg tak sudah2......
hamba Allah tu plak diam jek pas aku sms dgn mode-kecik ati tadikkk....Tak gheti nak pujuk ke hapa ....ishhhhh
dekat 12.30... Hamba Allah tu call... tanya makan haper... ( sajaaaaa nak bagik org panas hati balik lak tuuu)..-mmg dah tau terang2 aku ckp aku mogok makan hari ni kannnnn.. lagik mau tanya.. POODAAAAHHH!
aku ckp aku tak makan padahal dah abis setengah peket aku kunyah kacang kuda... so mood amarah aku ala2 kuda gak la ni kann..
Dia suh aku cakap ngan anak dia ( kira anak aku gak la kan kan kan)...sbb dia slalu cakap.. ur daughter wants to talk to u( waaa.. aku kengkadang lupa aku pun dah ada anak ka? ishhh)
Pas tu dah ckp sepatah dua kata... pass back to him.. dia cakap dia akan beli ubikayu n rebus cam yg aku nak .. dan aku cakap TAKPAYAH...
segala jenis ubi pun takkan menyejukkan hati aku dah... ( GILA emo aku nih kang.. cam nyampah la plak aku ngan peel aku sendiri neyh)..
Pas tu letak phone aku sambung makan kacang balik.. di topup ngan bun gardenia tu n air kotak.. ( cakapnya mogok makan kan.. poodahh sekali utk macikk)
Eh serius... mood aku hari ni.. ciiiiiiiimpeng jekk......
cam sakit perut plak pas minum air kotak...
and pas solat jumaat dia call lagik.. duk tanya berkali2 betul aku taknak makan ptg nihh..
nii yg malas neyhh..
siap tanya apa yg terdetik dalam otak aku nak makan ptg karang..
aku cakap takderr... sebab aku mmg dah jemu makan kat luar...
last wknd, gila heaven aku masak nasik makan ngan telur n kicap jek.. pas tu ahad masak nasik goreng ngan hamchoy.. bley?
tapi rasa cam kesian plak sbb dia asyik duk tanya ...aku pun cakap aku nak makan...............
PIZZA!
haiyaaa... aku takder la rasa nak makan sgt pun.. sbgb perut aku dah penuh ngan kacang neyhh.. cam angin la plakk..
serius .. aku rasa aku mmg sangat gumuk skrg.. bleyy.... walaupun dah 2 hari takmakan nasik.. tapi aku makan benda lain seperti meehoon , tosei, horfun...
hari tu cam tak lalu makan sekejap sbb pikir nak admitted segala bagai...
tapi skrg cam riang ria cuti skolah plak dah... tnggu tgh bln depan aku pasti akan murung balik time nak admiited..
so, kesimpulannya...
aku ini sangat buruk perangainyaa.. kan kan kan...
yee.. aku ngaku.. dan sangat emo tidak betempat...
Last but not least...
aku tgh dlm memproses nak menaiktarafkan mood aku ni.. tapi hari sudah petang..
esok2 jek la... naiktarafkan mood tu....
larikkkk!~

Hari Jumaat yang ....

Sesungguhnya hari ini macik dtg pepagi dengan mood yang zero (bley?)...
dan ini adalah disebebkan ( kemungkinan yang sangat tinggi) perkara-perkara berikut: (disenaraikan mengikut kronologi masa);
1. Semalam dinner kat oldtown kopitiam dan telah 'terorder' dia nya signature drink, cold white coffee (dan bila minum terasala tersangat concentratednya); dan arakian dimaklumkan makcik kalau minum sebarang jenis minuman berasaskan kopi selepas pukul 6 ptg, makaaaaaaaaaa macik akan mengalami kesukaran utuk tidur dengan nyenyak. makaaaaaaaa--
2. selepas pukul 11, walaupun macik sudah masuk ke kamar peraduan, tetaaaaapla makciktidak mengantuk, lalu makcik cober2 membaca buku cerita, tappppppppppi walaupun sudah habis 1/2 buku yang dibaca, makcik masih tidak tido, laluuu makcik pun tutup buku dan memejamkan mataaaa
makaaaaaa hasilnyaaaa---
3. tidor makcik tidak nyenyak, minda masih aktif sementelah memutarkan mimpi2 yang pelbagai contohnya, makcik telah memotong sebnyak 30 markah seorang studnt yang telah meniru skema jwapan makcik yang berada disebelahnya, walaupun makcik telah melarang dia sebelum itu ( motif makcik juga telah gigih menjawab soalan exam itu, tudaklah makcik ketahui), dannn kemudian mimpi itu melalut2 hingga ke bahagian seorang anak buah makcik telah terselam kepalanya di dlm mangkuk tandas sewaktu makcik menggunakan bilik air tersebut untuk mandi.. makaaaa gigihhhla juga makcik menyiram dan membilas kepalanya itu.. didlm mimpi tersebut...makaaaaa
4. bila jam di dihandphone berbunyi pada pukul 6.15 pagi, terdetik di hati macik untuk mengambil EL ( kerana perasaan malas tetiba membuak apabila tidur nya tidak lena) tapi makcik berusaha juga untuk melangkah ke bilik air dan mandi segala bagai dan bersiap.. haruskah?
5. Mood makin merudum bila ada la plak hamba Allah ini menidakkan keinginan macik utk membli cakoi sebagai bekal kerana di khuatiri too'oily".. cesssssss... laluuuuuuuu
6. makcik meng-order la makanan ruji di pagi hari iaitu sekeping tosei, tapi manusia yg duk ngadap makcik kat meja mamak itu (yg turut sama meng-order tosei) tidak mengahbiskan 1/2 dr toseinya itu, ( sambil sempat juga menambah cebisan2 toseinya ke dalam pinggan makcik) makaaaa harusla makcik anginkann.. kalau dah order tapi makan tak habis.. itukan pembaziran yang merupakan amalan shaitonnn kekdahnya? ditambah lagi.....
7. bila makcik menanya, hamba Allah itu membalas.. 'takpe la, lain kali i tak makan bfast, minum air jek"----dannnnnnnnn makcik pun terus meng-smash.. 'macam tu, i pun takyah bfast kat luar, makan jek kat rumah, leh makan macam2 kat rumah tu pun, tak payah nak pikir menu apa nak makan"---ye, sungguh'awkward' dan sengalnya tika itu..dan lebih memburukkan keadaan makcik yg semakin ilang mooddddnya itu...
8. di dalam kereta, makcik pantang sangat diperdengarkan citer2 masa lampau yang tidak sedap di dengar.. tapi macik dengarkan jugaa sebab macik malas nak 'melaser'kan diri.... dan yg paling meruntun hati ( sebab macik pagi ni kan.. tak ckup tido, makaa kesinsitipan tu harus la berlipat kali gandakann)..
9. Bila macik turun keter, sambil membawak jajan utk dimakan masa lunch, paper dan jugak poster holder, ( manyak meno menda kena hangkutnya), tetiba terkuarla perkataan dengan intonasi yg sungggguuuhhh 'annoying' drpd yang memandu kereta itu.. yang sah-sah dituju kepada macikkk kan..
"GEMOK!" dengan nada ala2 samseng kg dusn dengan tjuan nak mengejek ( boleh bayang dak?)... dan macik terus terkedu di situ sekejap... lepas tu boleh lagi hamba allah tu menyambung " sampai nak tanggal butang baju tu.. bla bla bla)....
10. makcik masuk bilik , rasa cam nak nangis.. cuba kontrol.. pas tu.. gave a piece of my mind in a sms to him...
Iyaaa.. cuba kalau dia cakap dlm intonasi yg berbeza ke.. tidak la macik akan terasa dengan begitu sekali kan.. and he claimed tat its only a joke..
iya la joke... MACIK EMO OKEYYYYYY! sementelah byk faktor2 sebelum itu yg menyumbang ke pada ke-emosionalan macikk.. dan hasilnyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa...
MAKCIK TAK RASA NAK BUAT KIJE LANGSUNG..
eh boleh tak balik rumah pi basuh baju yg sebaldi kat bilik air tu ka? ke sambung tido jap agi atas meja ke....
boleh kann?

Tuesday, November 11, 2008

Pagi ni, sewaktu melantak tose dn jayanya ( lately, i m such a tosai fan) .. feels like having tosai everyday, i just love the coconut chutney ( tah.. napa tah), so behind my table , there were a bunch of chinese students cladded with their uniforms from the school nearby. today is the 1st day for those who sat for SPM. Teringat la plak diriku.. 23 thn lepas when i sat for my SPM. ( iya, makcik sangat tua okehh.. ala2 fossil gitu hahaha). those were the days, which i wouldnt have any gut to lepak kat restoran mamak on my the 1st, where as these students sdgn sibuk bergelak ketawa sambil makan bekal dorang kat restoran mamak on their 1st day? Fuhh.. makcik sungguh kagum.. eh usually 1st day selalunya BM paper kan?.. walaupun takder la nak wat last min prep tapiiii.. tetapppppppppppla makcik tak lalu makan jugak..apatah lagi nak merewang2 kat restoran mamak sblm nak masuk xm hall..
On 'meruntun rasa ' note... makcik is still procrastinating ... of works n others.
To make it worse, my 2 students who have just registered to do their masters with me, tetiba dapat post PTD. and they decided to quit their masters ( even b4 they really started).. and i am so so disappointed wth them.. for not able to really set their minds on wat they really wanna do after graduated.
iyaa.. memang aku sentappp la gak... sbb dulu merayu2 nak mintak sambung masters, but once they got the job offer, they just 'dumped' me. ..
Tapi takder la aku salahkan mereka jugak.. iya la.. kan sekarang ni.. money is everything.. furtthering their studies has become the last resort for some students..
tapi yg jadi mangsanya.. adalah makcik jugakkk....
well lesson learnt.. next time i m gonna be very careful in choosing the students who want to further their studies.. only those who have set their mind to do the post grad studies will beselected next time.. to those who grab which ever comes first.. i m gonna give a piece of my mind on tis matter...
Memamng menyusahkan idup makcik tauuu... bcos the next batch of studn will only avail july next year.. and by tat time.. i need to submit progress report to MOHE already..
manyak susah la cam ni...
gotta run.. cm ngantuk h ni...

Friday, November 07, 2008

Tetiba jek rasa cam nak post lebih dr satu entri ( Motif: takrajin la sangat sebelum ni)... tapi hari ni.. taktau kenapa.. buat kije asyik tersekat-sekat especiially bila nak update KPI kat kmportal tu.. perlu la proofs bagai.. pas tu nak kena pi cari balik dokumen/letters kat rak .. ishhh... alangkah baiknya jikalau aku ini.. seorang yg organised dan... sangat prihatin dalam bab menyimpan dokumen ni (bley?)
Lepas tu kan...
Haaa... they have set anthr Op-date for me.. which is anthr 1.5 months from now. So i supposed when you hve already set yr mind dat u r not gonna do anywork throught tis november.. and suddenly yr plan changed..maka harus la aku terkulat-kulat pikir apa menda yg nak di-'kerjakan' sepanjang bulan ni kan? That explained my clumsiness for the past few days.. ala-ala transition period gitu..
so for the past few days.. seriusss.. terasa sangat malas nak pikir apa yg harus di'kerjakan' dahulu.. padahal. manyak sangat menda bley buat tu.. contohnya.. kemaskan bilik aku ni.. yg bersepah cam library tak dikemaskan dek librarian barang seminggu..
Ishh rasanya dengan tahap kelambatan aku procrastinating kije... harus la.. takder apa2 hasil nampaknya sehingga aku start mc balik tgh bulan depan..
*sambil menghempuk2 kepala kat cpu*
cam nyampah la plak mikirkan diri yang tak produktif neyhh.. haishhh langsung aku tak bangga dgn diri aku sendiri neyhhhh.....

Entri di pagi jumaat

Malam tadi saya tidur awal iaitu lebih kurang pukul 8.30 malam. Tidak sempat untuk melihat drama cinta batu belah kat TV9 itte which has become my regular drama series.
Tersangat lamanya saya tidur. dan pagi ini ... saya makan nasik lemak yang membuatkan saya rasa sungguh 'guilty'...
Tapi tak kesah lah..
Dan sekejap lagi... mungkin saya akan menguap balik gara-gara nasik lemak yg sungguh best ( tapi pagi ini sambal dia tidak 'kick' seperti mana yang biasa)..
Ye.. bagus bagus... blame it on d nasi lemak...
Memang begitu kan sikap manusia... Tidak pernah cuba mengakui kesilapan sendiri.. tapi sedaya upaya akan menuding jari kepada benda lain, semata-mata untuk menafikan sikap buruk sendiri..
Aku pun tergolong dalam kategori itu juga... ....kot..

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Feel like posting another entry.. (even tho aku masih dalam mode mild sentap agik)
Yang pertamanya:-
aku sayang mak aku.. walaupun aku selalu rasa aku ni dah byk mengecewakan dia. or aku dah byk menangis kerana penrnyataan pedas dia ( adohaii), tapi.. disebabkan makcik ni taknak menjadi anak DURHAKA, makcik hanya mendiamkan diri sahaja, tanpa menjawab walaupun makcik akur la sangat bahwa segala kenyatan yg dibuat oleh ibuku tersayang itu langsung tidak relevan ( tis is actually to clarify the buckets of tears over last weekend's incidence).. Yes, i ve learnt and am still learning not to hurt my mom's feelings eventho in the end its my feeling which hurts most
Keduanya-
even tho I cud admit that I am a COMPLICATED person but if it were to come from other ppl's mouth, it surely offended me alot, especially when u ve been elaborating it into details..and one more thing... how sure r u, tat it was how i felt when or vice versa.. maybe it was one of yr assumptions/ analysis again which u always think tat u r good at it
KETIGANYA-
i believe that when u concern abt someone, u at least give a few mins of yr time to sms or call, rather than leaving msgs in Ym ( bcos I rarely login to YM now, and if u saw me on line, it doesnt me tat I am really online, sumtime i do login via my hp, checked my emails for a few mins and logout but others wud still see me online.. and to know tat i am the one wth a few maladies here, dun xpect me to spread the news everytime i went thru hard times
KEEMPATNYA-
Go reread yr entry again and put yrself in my shoes. Then u will know wat I ve been trying to tell u. Not to mention, i also read comments and i can feel a tinge of insinuations in one or two comments.. ( and I DID NOt say FINALLY)- i reread my entry on tat particular matter.. I do not understand WHY do u have to sound so cynical abt it ( bcos i didnt say, tat there'd be others who wud do the same thing if i were sick?).. anyway I ve been sick for a long time (apart from the one mentioned in blog), and have u ever asked how i ve been before? rather than claiming that u did leave me a few msges in my YM, which i ve never received bcos they have blocked my YM in d office for months now ( which i d never able to bother bcos i have lotsa things to do when i m at work). I have my ego too, i dun go and announce to d world dat somehow, they have suspected tat it might be a malignant thingy . I have enuff problems to deal with, and there you go accusing me of being complicated and elaborating more nonensical theories abt me. Ko kata ko terasa, walaupun takder satu patah pun yg leh link-kan entri aku tu ngan ko, in fact sorry to say, i did not think abt anyone when i wrote the entry. tats wat i felt. he was there , awlasy there for me for the past 6 months. Everyone i know is either so bz with their familes, babies, old schoolmates. I m not jealous of others bcos i know, they have their own world. let them be la kan. so i met him and we became friends. Is it wrong bcos i didnt tell to any one of u? Ada aku marah ko takder bagi tau aku wat u ve been doing or whom u ve met recently? wat i knew if thru yr blog which i follow frequently. Ko ingat aku tak terasa ke? AKU SANGAT SANGAT TERASA OK! cam la aku ni kalau sakit cuma patut mintak tlg pada kawan2 rapat aku yg dah berbulan pun taktanya khabar aku, tapi aku tak kesah pun sbb aku pun sama. I beleive in up n downs of a realtionship/friendship. Semua org ada hidup masing2. satu ketika kita rapat pas tu tak lagi. so dat's it la. Aku pun ada kehidupan aku sendiri. Ishhhhh aku takpaham sebenarnya apa yg telah meng-initiiatekan isu ni.. tapi ap[a yg aku tau aku mmg SENTAP ok... cam la aku ni... aku ni... ishhhh ( takder ayat yg sesuai nak ditulis kat sini)
IRESTMY CASE. yg sebenarnya.. aku dah malas nak sentap pun..sbb aku dah malas nak ambik port.. dan seperti yg dah aku tulis , tats final. sbbnya.. yes its too complicated.. as u said i am.. so TAK PAYAH NAK RISAU OR WATSOEVER NGAN ORG COMPLICATED NI>> aku tak ambik tau kisah ko.. ko takyah la ambik tau hal aku...kalau ada org yg sanggup nak angkat aku dr tingkat 10 pun , ada org lain kisah? ko pegi la angkat org lain yg memerlu ianya di angkat dr tingkat atas ke tingkta bawah.. kalau rasa nak mengangkat sgt..

DAH... end of my anger management entry,

Sunday, November 02, 2008

and I tot November is not in d calendar..

My mom used to say to me.. "biarlah orang buat kita, tapi kita jangan buat orang"
and my mom also said, i used to be a blunt person, blurting out harsh remarks without considering other ppl's feelings. yes, I am ( was) a blunt person when i was surrounded by the families, and siblings. used to be blunt among "close' friends too.
But i was trying not to be blunt anymore. I ve learnt how to hide and keep it inside. I blabbered to myself if i were not satisfied with others or things i did. I am trying so hard not to hurt other feelings too, intentionally.
But somehow, along the process. I may have offended others unintentionally , with my remarks, my impromptu entries in blogs maybe. ( i can always say tat tis is my blog, i can write watever i feel like writing, to hell with other ppl;s feelings bcos i never meant to include or offend others in this blog'f mine.
And I never disclosed my personal life in here. Evry entry posted here, is all totally on the surface side. Im not putting every itinerary detail of the events narrated here. and besides, my blog is not in any other bloggers' lists except for one or two. and thats the only number that I knew have been following my blog.
and why am i suddenly becoming emtotional tonite? I m not gonna tell it, its nothing important tho. after all, i am always a 'complicated' person. nobody knows wat i have in mind except The ALLMIGHTY. betul la tu kan.
ok.. enuff abt tat..
on happier note.. they postponed my operation to next month. When i have physically and mentally prepared for the op, they decided, yes.. 12 hours before the operation, that they need to do a retest for my CA125 and CA99 level.
and yes, I m going to the clinic again the day after tomorrow, for the final result.
My parent is alreday here when i called them telling the 'good' news. felt guilty bcos they have flown all the way from KB to be with me on that DAY, alas its been postponed.
I ve been picturing myself on medical leave throught tis month. How should I know tat I ll be working for another month before being admiited again? haishh kacau sungguh. there goes off all my well planned schedule.
My students have been msging me non stop, asking how my condtion is. thinking tat i ve safely undergone my surgery. I was discharged last wednesday, 12 hrs before i was supposed to be wheeled into the OT
What i can say, but somehow, deep inside, i know there must be a blessing indisguise in all these.( ye la.. aku ni kan seorang peng-redha dengan segala yang ditentukan)
my parent, my bro and SIL pun dah happily flown to langkawi this morning for a vacation till tuesday. and they r going back to KB on wednesday.
come to think of it, they wont have the chance to enjoy them selves, if i were undergone the op last thursday. amongst a few other incidences which made me wept into bucket of tears .. yeah... not revealing anything as usual.. :D
Dun really feel comfortable writing in this 'sentap' condition tho. and it did take some time to compose such crappy but emotionally versed entry tho.
Akhir kata.. apa yg aku rasa ni biar lah aku tanggung sendiri... complicated or not, i m still a person with hearts ( plural kah?) and feelings... bak kata.. eman manan ( releavnkah dia ni?) "ter;ajak perahu boleh diundur.. terlajak tulis buruk padahnya.. kan kan..
so im deleting the previous mentioned entries , and next time I have to be EXTRAA careful with wat i posted. Bleh kan cik IDA?

Monday, October 27, 2008

And outta sudden...

Tidak la sudden sangat pun.. daku tetiba terasa nak hapdet blog ni ( walaupun in my previous entry i have bade my goodbye).. iya buruk siku la sangat aku ni kan?
dan tika dan saat ini.. aku terasa tersangat la mual dan ala2 nak muntah gitew....
sbb tadik aku pi goreng french fries yg dah berminggu duk dlm fridge.. lepas tu bila makan daku terasa cam penuh dgn limpahan minyak rasanya (walaupun dah jenuh aku mengesat2 kat tisu)..
dan tekak masih lagi trasa mula walaupun telah dibilas (bilas?) dengan lipton clear green tea ( yg penuh dgn antioksidan itu)..
Rasakan la makcik kan? Bukan kan akan selamat kalau makan jek sekut 'yaacob
cream cracker yg low-salt dan hi-fibre itu? ( sebenarnya itu la diet makcik semenjak 2menjak terasa malas nak turun walaupun setengah pelaung sajork daripda kedai easy mart yg skrang dah beroperasi 18 jam sajorkk.. ( tiada motif disini yerk tuanpuan)
Alkisahnya... sudah beberapa purnama daku tidak meng-exercisekan kaki ini untk melintas jalan waima ke kedai mamak diseberang jalan sana pun..
Motip? Adalah sorang hamba Allah ittew yg megakui sangat sayang pada makcik ini.. telah melarang keras makcik melintas kerana khuatir makcik akan dilanggar oleh kereta yg lalulalang dan sangat laju mengalahkan makcikn yg terkedek2 ala2 kura-kura ini...
Owh btw, makcik telah berjaya berjalan ke MekDonald dengan jaya pada malam ahad lepas yang jaraknya cuma 25 tapak saja daripada rumah makcik (which is equal to 5 tapak Sang Kelembai sajork ye tunapuan)..
dan tujuan makcik ke Mekdonald di dalam kepekatan malam ittew adalah tak lain tak bukan hendak membeli set fish deluxe ( setelah terpengaruh dgn iklan yg dilihat di tv saban malam, dan dengan bangganya.. makcik ingin mengumumkan.. ini adalah pertama kali makcik membaham MekDonald setelah hampir 2.5 bulan..
Ye.. satu tempoh yg agak lama ( yahooo... bangga sungguh hati ini), setelah makcik berazam untuk tidak 'membedal' sebarang produk MekDonald, setelah kali terakhir dilihat mentekedarah filet -o-fish (selama 2 hari berturut2) di Athens bulan Ogos lepas...

makcik yg kontrol ayu, tapi takayu pun masa tgh makan dgn kiutnya fries yg dicucuk kat garpu kecil.. kat McDonald Athens.. ada beskal yg digantung kat siling kat belakang tu.. tapi hampeh taknampakla plak kan..)
sementelah keesokan harinya makcik tetap la juga nak berposa, dan disebabkan sahur pagi tu macik cuma membaham semangkuk maggi tasty lite.. makaaaa haruslah makcik mengalami hipoglisemia bila dah dekat2 nak buka posa tu kan?
Nasib baik la, hamba Allah yg sangat sayangkan makcik itu telah membeli sebungkus nasik beryani di kedai mamak seberang jalan sana ( ya macik turut pegi menemani beliau walaupun hanya duduk dalam keter sajork).. dan itulah juadah makcik berbuka posa pada hari semalam...
tidak la sedap sgt... tetapi dalam keadaan yg dah rasa terawang -awangan, tetpa la macik membaham setengah bekas polisteren itu..
disebabkan lauknya adalah kari ayam mamak ( harus di ingatkan makcik tersengatla alergiknya dengan sebarang kuah bersantan, tak soker kekdahnya tau).. maka makan la jugak macik dengan linangan dan deraian airmata.. (sbb nak marah kat org yg beli nasik.. takbleh la plak kan depan rezeki) .. tapi tah kenapa la plak semalam cam sentimental smacam jek...
dan hari ini... macik telah pergi ke Noodle Station kat alamanda tu disebabkan dah 2 hari makcik mengidam nak makan noodle kat situ..
harus di ingatkan... noodle station ini.. sebenarnya ber-ibupejabat di Kota Bharu ( ha pandai la aku).. dan sebarang kedai2 makan yg berpusat di Kota Bharu dan telah dikembangkan sayapnya ke Pantai barat ini.. harus la disokong penuh oleh seorang anak jati Tanah Serendah Sekebun Bunga seperti macik ini tauu..
Tapi rasanya choices of noodles-nya tidak la sebanyak yg kat Kb so.. terpaksa lah makcik berpuas hati dengan springy noodlesnya sajorkk..
sangat sedap okehh.. hatta makcik telah 'ter'-order springy noodles with tomyam ala2 yg kat bangkok sana..
yer.. ada santan.. tapi makcik tetap la soker sbb rasa dia masam2.. dan cili jeruknya tersangat masam dan sedap.. ( airliur makcik masih meleleh mengenangkan cili hijau jeruknya tadi)
cecukup la citer pasal cili jeruk tadikk...
On 'gumbira' dan nervous note..
the parent will be coming tomorrow nite..
they will be beside me for the next Thursday event...
and for now.. macik cuma mengharapkan yang baik2 sahaja akan berlaku minggu hadapan...
Occay makcik?
yang ni betul2.. makcik kuar du;u yok.. Ada umo jumpa lagiks..

Friday, October 24, 2008

A few days before the big O-day

yes.. a bit bz tho.. cos some of them have informed taht there ll be more meetings next weeks. which i wont be able to attnd bcos I d be on M-leave starting next tuesday. hence, there r a few documents n reports n more reports that need to be submitted for those meetings. I have students who r really worried whether they cud do their lab works during my absence. well, i was on medical leave last year for 1 1/2 months and some of them didnt even realise my absence tho.
I m only worried about the loads of papers mounting on my desk, and yesterday this 'small mountain; has actually 'collapsed'. When it comes to organising paperworks and tidying up my desks, i am a Hopeless no 1. *sighing*
In the meantime, i have so many things in my mind ie things to do, lecturer to chase, wat to eat for dinner bcos the last meal tat i had was this morning. I dun wanna think of wat's gonna happen to me after next Thursday. Lets just leave it in the hand of GOD, i supposed. anyway.. i m gonna close this blog temporarily till .. I dunno when.
I m trying to think positive here tho. ..
so till then.. adieu.

Sunday, October 19, 2008

Since raya is not over yet..

and tat's y i m feeling so vain ( apakah?) posting the pics of the family during last raya (while hoping that there wont be any family members of mine who accidentally found my blog and realised that I ve actually pasted and disclosed their pics to public).. Yes, people. family makcik sebenarnya memang sangat penyegan orangnya ( termasuk juga makcik yang kadangkala mempunyai mood 'diva' yang entah datang dari hulu mana tah, tapi tetap menten ala2 keturunan terakhir cik siti wan kembang gitu), maka motif mempamerkan muka di sini , kalau dalam kamus keluarga makcik samalah seperti.. ermm tetiba maenghidangkan lauk kari di hariraya gittew (sebab kuarga makcik tak suka lauk2 berkolestrol nih, kitorang cuma prefer lauk santan-less contohnya seperti ikan singgang, asam pedas dan apa2 kuah tanpa penggunaan santan gitu ( sangat tidak relevan dan tiada kaitankan?)
enuff of me talking craps..tapi terimalahhhh......


this is one big happy family of mine, consisting of 7 siblings and of course my parent. Luckily, all of my bros and sisters celebrated the 1st raya at my mom's this year. selalunya payah nak semua ada, last year my youngest sis was in penang at her grandparent's in law, 2nd youngest sister was also at her PIL, my 2nd eldest sis was at her IL"s too and my eldest bro was also at his FIL's. Every year, the only ones who remain at home is your's truly and my 2nd bro. Tu pun bcos my SIL is a convert so harus la every raya beraya kat rumah kitorang kan? The only sister who was not in the pic is my eldest sis. she never celebrated raya with us bcos she'd never be. My late grandma took her when she was 40 days old. and ever since she's wth my late grandma tll she passed away 10 yrs ago. well, we 'd pay her a visit on the 2nd raya since I cudnt remember when( sbb dah lama sangat kan). But overall the number of my nieces n nephews r now 21, well another 2 are coming in, early next year.
panjang lebo lak makcik citer kan, ala2 hikayat la plak. anyway. makcik tadak dalam gambar tau bcos i was in invisible mode at tat time (boley!)



these r all the dishes tat we had on the 1st raya. mahapla, kalau korang nak makan lemang ka, ketupat ka, rendang ka, sila pindah duk lain negeri ye, as we dun have such dishes in kelantan. besides they r so unpopular in kelantan. kalau hidang lemang tu agaknya dorang jeling sebelah mata jek la kot. So on 1st day, we had nasi bukhari courtesy of my sis in law, sate which we ordered in a small amount, and we had variety of cakes. My BIL which is a KL-ites was so jakun when he spent his 1st raya in kelantan a few years ago. Dia cakap kat Kl mana der kek segala bagai ni masa raya, bcos they only have main dishes and cookies only. So dia pelik la apasal byk sgt kek yg terhidang kat atas meja masa raya. Well i have no idea too,but as fara s I remember, every year, my sis'd never fail to bake her special choc moist cake, masa makcik kecik. my 2nd eldest sis did all the baking, but when she had her own family, my 2nd youngest sis took over as the sweet delicacies chef in the house. makcik? NAN ADO. sbb makcik tak makan kek, tunjuk la kek apo pun, cheese cake ka, sponge cake ka, choc cake ka, i wont drool over em. huhuhuh. ( tapi tetap la menten montel gak kan wlupun takmakan kek)




On the 3rd raya, we held a barbecue, which has become an annual event every raya. All the males dgn gigih meng-grill hasil tangkapan laut yg kami jala kat pasar KOK Kg China, dan aku juga dgn gigih nya men-nye-nap gambar yg tah hapa2. Owh gambar masa makan nan ado ye tuan puan sbb bbq tersebut telah mendapat sambutan yg menggalakkan dr spupu2 makcik yg duk sebelah rumah dan yg duk jauh skit.. so tak nyempat nak snap pics. lagipun tadak sorang pun yg berblog amongst my family members ni.. so untuk mengelakkan syak wasangka yang terlampau dr tetamu2, makcik idokla rasa nak men-yenap gambar sebaliknya hanya menjadi ala-puteri saadong qaedahnya dengan mengarah2 kembang2 cina merangkap my nieces untuk mengambil makanan. sementelah macik hanya mampu bersemayam atas kerusi ala2 patung cendana sahaja.. yg len.. duk jek makan kat bawah.

Memandangkan mendapat sambutan yg sangat menggalakkan, koordinator aka adik macik yg nih telah bersetuju utk me-mark up contribution untuk setiap famuly. Yer.. macik harus la gigih menabung mulai sekarang untuk menampung kos bbq itu nanti. Sangat tidak adil ok.. sbb dorang bayar utk the whole family tapi makcik tetap di kenakan bayran yg sama walaupun hanya sebatang kara, cess!Udah le macik hanya mampu melantak 2 ekor sotong, seekor udang, seketul ayam dan sesenduk mash potato sajork ( dan bergelas2 air ribena soda ala2 Wiiliams itu tuan puan) sangat sedap hasil tangan adik bungsu makcik yg ini merangkap mash-potato chef.

(opps sorry pic not attached sbb dia tak pakai tudung masa diambil gambarnyam but i am attaching her son's pic on her behalf (sbb my mom cakap anak dia sejibik cam dia tapi girl version la masa kecik dulu)


last but not least, this is a pic of my Ma n Bak.( ada backgound lagu raya dari jauh ku pohon maaf by Sudirman di situ). Next year will be their 50th year wedding aniversary tho.



dan ni pic tak snonoh which i snapped. I was aiming at the clouds actually. sungguh amatur pics ini kan?


and these are the anak teruna in the family, who did not help at all in preparing the bbq tapi makan kalahkan org yg buat kije. Bebudak ini suka sangat 'memnunjuk' ketinggian dia memandangkan makcik ni hanya takat bahu dorang sajork.


Terkini, si tasha yg umo 12 thn ni pun dah lagi tinggi dari makcik, tidakkk! Terasa sangat kerdil diri ini.


lagi 10 thn, these 3 cutie pies ni pun akan lagik tinggi dr makcik jugak. Huwaaaaaa.

Maka dengan itu. sekian la hikayat terung pipit di raya 2008 untuk kali ini. pas ni.. jgn sebut pasal raya lagi dah.. (especially not about HEIGHT, makcik emo kalo)
SELESAI SUDAH

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Its just dat...

I ve been a bit occupied lately ( bukan bz ye tuan puan, bcos I hve time to bloghop and OFTEN i got carried away.. haishh apa kah)

But being a so so blogger who update her blog according to her MOOD and ample ( la sangat) time.. i only manage to post entries when i feel like.. hmm... punching the keyboard.. ( as most'f d time wat i do is totally dragging the mouse to my beck n call , mouse pad pun tarak tauuu)

Besides, nobody really wanna know wat i ve been doing all day, or where i ve been going for the past few days ( unless i feel like telling the ppl out there which is so rare of me la,, (unless the motive is to let out this grumpiness or totally complaining)

Ishhh .. ha kan dah.. am having writer's block again.. tadi rasa cam byk beno nak ditulisnya...

Haishhhhh...

as they said.. some things r better left unsaid...

well a bit mebbe.. am counting down the days .. well anthr anthr 2 weeks be the big O-day..Cant' wait (sila baca dengan penuh nada ironi ye)




the cutie pies were queuing, taking turns to salam atuk n tuk wan n later to collect duit raya from the aunties n uncles.. the 'bigger' generation ( age range 10-18 y.o )were not too keen to queue with the smaller ones tho

Saturday, October 11, 2008

A week after Raya


yes.. wat can i say.. i was too bz went to n fro the hospital. On tuesday, i was supposed to have a follow up at Rheu clinic, alas, when i reached there, they said, it's been postponed to the end of the month. and they have sent me a letter informing me dat. Well.. i didnt receive any letter, they shud have called me instead. as this's the sole reason y i rushed back to KL. BCOS I TOT I HAVE AN APPOINTMENT WITH THE CLINIC, and now they told me they have sent me a letter. tat is totally an excuse so dat I wont blame them for their neigligence (AKU MARAH NI! BOLEH!)
I left the hospital at 11 ish, and called my niece to get ready as we re sending her straight to Banting. decided not to go to work bcos i m wearing jeans, dun feel like going back home and change into a proper slack. Malas haku!
I went to work the next day. and went to the hopsiral again for anthr appt at anaesth clinic. Ishh.. Finished at 11 and went straight to work afterwards. Had class at 2. and wasnt feeling well since early morning tho. Tot of going back home early.. but.. He didnt come. I called his hp for 100th times, called my home in case he went there during my absence.. tapi NAN ADO. waited for an hour and my patience has almost come to an end. I was dementedly worried.. wat if he collapsed or.. involved in an an accident......haishhhh
then He called...he fell asleep and put his phone on silent mode...and I was like.. GRRRRRRRRRR.... sabo macik sabo..
swallowed 2 panadols and fell asleep on the couch infront'f d tv. woke up arnd 11.30 , had a mug of nescafe.. went back to sleep.
The body started aching soon after dat. the throat hurt, the joints ached..woke up again at 6.30. dragged my body to the bathroom.. i was a bit feverish. called him.. dwont think i cud make it to work ..left a msg to kak sab...
He came. Cooked me bfast. ( it was 2 sliced of toast, with scramled egg, and a mug of nescafe). forced me to swallow the food. The throat still hurt tho.
Went to clinic at 9. Got some antibiotics and lozenges. I was asleep all morning, till the afternnon,woke up to eat my lunch and dozed off again. He called me every hour to check on me. At 6.30 pm, after his call, i woke up and took my shower.
.. and thats how i ended my my day. a week after raya.. i may sound miserable but to know tat there is someone who's as miserable as me when i was sick.Pampered me with his overconcerned 'nusrsing' skills... tat's priceless. To 'him', i know u r willing to 'piggyback' me if i were too weak to go down from the 1st floor. I am so touched.
All of my life, I ve been too independent tat I forgot how good it was to be taken care of sometimes. ..
to 'him'.. Thank you..

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

Post-raya

Think i m gonna be sick.. a consequence of living with a sick niece who definitely has spread her 'cold' virus to me. despite her taking precaution for not sleeping wth me on the same bed..
told u i have weakest immune system..Well I m not alone tho..
anyway on happier note( happy kah?), tomorrow is my first day after long raya leave.. walaupun aku dah terpacak kat Kl ni since last saturday..as there r some unfinsihed business to be attended beforehand..
too lazy to write more.. next time la plak..







The cutie pies in the family. they kept on moving and not able to stay still whilst their aunt dgn gigihnya nak me-'nyenap' gambar nih..

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Blue blue sky





Just wanna show the fantastic sky pics that i snapped the other day. I tried to find it again when i looked upon the sky again this morning. yet, it wasnt there anymore. i was pretty sure tat the nite b4 it showed on the sky, it must be an amazing nite. apakah????
they said we can actually noticed some changes in the morning . mayybe this is one of em. Wallah hu alam

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

Early morning

Nah.. its not early anymore but the actual thing is i ve been up since 4.45 am and hasnt caught a wink afterwards. After sahur, washed the clothes and before i knew,its already azan. at 6, aku dah siap make-up (not!)bagai dah hahaha. P was already downstairs, cos he tot he was late. so at 6.45, berlenggang kangkung la aku turun nak pi kije. Cam best jek kan bila ada org hantar n ambik kije kan?
such a serene morning, with crystal clear sky. It was a breath-taking, picturesque view when i look upon the sky tis morning. managed to snap it wth my hp. Cantekkkk sesangat.
owh well.. i d better continue marking the papers now. managed to finished 10 scripts wthin an hour. Feeling sleepy in the middle of the marking...and Mariah Carey has been singing the same song for like 100 time already, hence this entry. Hhhhaishhhhhhhhh...

another picturesque scenery of The Glenegl Beach at Adelaide tat I snapped Last december, well the sky is a so-so tho. Managed to snap a girl in bikini as well, tapi mana tah aku letak pic tu.. hahaha

Sunday, September 21, 2008

So wut's next?

Posting new entry on sunday, well its not my kinda thing actually. Sundays shud be spent lazing on yr couch, watching ridiculous programmes on tv, clicking to every astro channel and last but not least, dozing yrself off.
Alas, in tis euphoric mind of mine, last friday, i accidentally brought all my works back ( so dat I cud finsih doing at home).. well and till this very moment, I HAVE NOT touched em yet. so much for the resolution la kan!
On a lighter note, ( not talking about my bring works here tho), went to Mines yesterday. and again, going shopping on weekends is like going to the faculty on public holidays for me. ( have to admit tat I am a homely (la sangat) person). Anyway, since I ve promised someone to take her to shop ( and this is the only weekeend tat I d be free cos I m going back home next friday(YAy!, so nak taknak terpaksa la kuar jugak kan! and prior to tat there was like a string of threatening episodes occured ( I can be extra emotional first thing when I woke up in the morning, occay!), before I decided to go out ( tat was another story, not gonna highlight my childish attitude la kan). So off we went, in the midst of the hot day, and there were like, masyaalahhh ramainya umat kat MINES tu. I managed to come back at 3.30, exhausted of course, especially the knee. Luckily have a niece yg rajin nak turun bawah beli lauk untuk buka posa.
Even went to bed early last nite. The eyes were a bit uncomfortable since the morning.. a bit sandy some more. Must be the impact of weeping tragically at 5.30 am while watching a rerun of Seputeh qaseh ramadhan on tv. See.. betapa emotionalnya aku di pagi hari.
Actually its the starting of caratct formation in my cornea. I was told by the endocrinologist when i was in the ward last time. She can even see it from afar, and when i took a close look of my eyes infront'f d mirror, yes, i did notice a very thin foggy film in it. So next operation wud gonna be a cataract removal eh? TIDAK!
well,, Im getting older, tats for sure, ( not gonna brag much @ complain about it tho).. take as wat it is la kan.
I feel lucky enuff to have the loved ones around me, the family epecially ( well we dun meet much during tis fasting month tho), the concern colleagues, and a few othesr who still remember me as their friends ( not sure if I had one) last time I checeked i have NONE, lol! and its not my style to let ppl know how i am la kan. deep inside, i am still a stubborn one who knows for sure tat i can rake care of myself, well with a tiny help from my "angel".
hahhaa.. just thinking of my "childish but its so happened to be true 'remark during the yesterday's 'episode". .
"U know how they made me feel? OFFENDED!"
Well i guess, i ve been offended with so many people during so many ocassions last time, and I guess i ve made them offended as well. Tit for a tat!
so... to those whom ive treated wrongly with or without me realising em before..( aku taktau la sapa.. tapi mesti la ada kan!).. I m sorry for all my wrong doings, intentions, ideas, inclduing all thsoe worst imaginary plans tat I ve in mind to retaliate. Hahaha jahatkan aku.
well....

yours truly infront'f the remnant temple of zeus, last august. It was a very hot day, and i nearly melted dat day, without a sunglass, my eyes cant even open properly. Hence, I bought a pair of sunglass yesterday, so dat this thing would never occur in the future. hahahaha. well am not gonna post a pic of new sunglass la kan.. nanti org cakap riak! huhuhuhu

Friday, September 19, 2008

From Sri Serdang to Banting

Feel like updating the blog.. tetiba lak kan.. ( nampak sgt mode malas tu)
Anyway, i woke up very early today. at 3.30 am ( hambik ko), feel like dozing off again for anthr 1/2 hr yet i ve been sleeping since 8.30 pm last nite , rasa2nya cukup2 la tu membuta kan? terawih pun tak buat.. isyak pun solat dalam keadaan separuh sedar.. heee ( sah ke idak ntahnya).
so, bila bangun pagi ni, dgn gigihnya pergi panaskan nasik.. abiskan murtabak yg tak bersentuh lanngsung semalam ( inagt nak makan pas terawih). makan dgn keadaan sepenuhnya sedar.. and for the past 15 days, macik tak sambung tido rite pas sahur. i waited for subuh instead, had my bath.. n terus bersiap pi kije. Sometimes it can be as early as 6.30 tapi tu pun kalau pintu grill kat laluan dpean tu dah buka. makcik tatau pun slama nih.. they have started locking the grill which is actually an access for all the flats from 1st to 4th floor.
so smalam bila pi kije awal, puas la makcik mengetuk2 padlock mintak buka.. luckily cina kat depan tu tolong buka kan.. siap tanya macik.. u tadak kunci ya?
ishh bila plak aku simpan kuncinya.. aku pun tatau bila masa dorang dah start kunci grill tu.. Rupa2nya budak2 kilang kat atas tu semua ada kunci masing2.. ishh., tak di-update rupanya aku neyhh..
Im going to Banting again rite after work to fetch my niece. Of lates, kije akunya pi banting on friday , once again on sunday to send her back. My niece is doing her IB course kat Kolej Mara Banting. Iya la berkat hasutan gigih ku, suh dia tukar wat course kat obersea.. She was in UIA matriculation course before till FELDA called her for a second intake in Buotecnology course . hahaha hadap sgt mak sedara dia ni.. kunun2nya kalau dia dah study kat sana, leh la mak sedara dia selalu2 pi menyinggah sana. provided the countries she goes restricted to yg belah2 europe sana jek.. ke kat ostolia ke.. kat NZ ka.. ermm kalau belah2 Pakistan ke India sana ke.. hmmm.. semangat nak menyinggah tu tersangat la kurang..
anyway, makcik's youngest sis ajak buka posa umah dia on sunday..kunun2nya dia post call tu sempat la masak2 bagai kat kakak dia neyhh..bagus la jugak.. since makcik dah tadak idea nak makan apa dah tuk buka posa.. 2-3x round kat pasar ramadhan sedrang tu pun.. still tadak idea nak makan apa.. Balik2 kerabu mangga, asam rebus keladi..ikan keli bakar tu jek yg leh masuk dek tekak.. Masak sendiri malas tu.. lagik mau komplen kann (astghafirullah)..
well... sambung kije.. makcikk!

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Pagi yang indah

Pagi Khamis yang damai ( la sangatt). I had an 8 am lecture . and then will be going to the main campus for JObmarket talk. and i ll have anthr class at 2 pm.
wahhhh sungguh gigihnya macik meng-lecturekan diri di bulan posa yang mulia ini..despite the painful kneecap.. yg tetiba rasa nak 'membengkak'kan sendinya when i woke up for sahur this morning. Tapi aimna tak kesahh..
should i do the countdown starting from today?
Cam bebudak lakrasanya kan..
am still waiting for P|-|IL to probe into my pc via skype so dat he can actually 'kill' the hijacker taht 's been nested inside my pc since last year. The reason why i m not able to browse using Mozilla anymore..
Thanks a lot Phil, ( if u r reading tis, i know u r). he's my IT angel. as he installed so many programmes which cudnt be installed before, organised my pc as well, among other things, and its a wonder bcos he can actually installed it in my pc when he's like at the other side of the world.

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Huh?

Nih nak komplen nih.. Sebab rasanya dah lama makcik tak komplen.. ( iya la.. kira prev entry tu bukan komplen, itu.. sesi meluahkan perasaan yang terbuku dalam hati)
Komplen pertama.
Outta sudden i ve becoming a favorite person in the faculty ( in terms of putting my name to go to any events organised either by univ or the fac ). dan tetiba jek aku asyik diarahkan utk pi kuru-sus la, talk la, taklimat la. macam la tak der org lain la ek.. skit2 nama macik naik.. skit2 nama macik naik.. ( mode ketuk2 meja tak puas ati). OF course la, buleh aje nak tepis.. iya la dah tepis pun kalau clash ngan kelas tapi kalau dah tak clash.. nak bohong cakap ada kelas? haishhh idok le teman nak buat cam tu..
Komplen kedua
Hmm takder da kot.. itu jek.. komplen byk2 bulan posa ni.. akan mencacatkan pahala berposa jek kan? kan?
Astaghafirullah-al-azim.. ( mode beristighfar dalam hati byk2)

Friday, September 12, 2008

Seriously.. i was so darn bzzz lately. and recently too, i ve been warded twice in 2 months. Being admitted while u r in yr so-called healthy condition brought a different meaning to the term 'admitted' itself. Wont mention mention anything about the system.. or else, they may blacklist me forever. owh.. by the way, I m gonna be admitted again for the real op, which wud take place at the end of October. the so called pre-op assessment ( katernya) didnt make my life easier anyway, as they assumed it wud be. Instead of going to numerous clinics on different days for the specialist reviews, they put me in a ward for one whole day so dat 'they' cud come and 'assess' me simultaneously BUT it didnt happen like it was supposed to be. The only 'good'thing came from this is.. i gotta rest for 3 days, ( but i was disturbed by those 'knowledge' sucker medical students non stop, who touched every bit of my organ (even the tot of them can actually make me raging,, erghhh!). I mean, its not my first time tho.. been acting as their'guinea pig' since i was 16. Somehow, they can be too much. i mean, do u really have to disturb the patients who actually wanna rest, and can accept it when the patients say NO, rather than insisting tat they r having their exam soon.
Seriously, they pissed me off at times. Not tat i refused to contribute for the medical community sake.. but hey... I am a patient here, u shud respect them, the patients cos they r human beings too.. like u. Sheeshh... i wont have this prob if i went to other hospitals which r not teaching hospitals.. alas.. im suck for life wth it tho...
The reason why i cant just simply got admitted.. as i wud go out more miserable than b4 i went in. Shud hire the clowns to cheer up those patients who r having similar problem as mine.. or am i the only one who feels this way aboutthis matter?

Thursday, September 04, 2008

If I were

a bird, i might have found a shelter already on the roof of this fac while waiting for the rain to stop.. owhh and please.. if i could choose wat kinda bird i wanna be.. i d choose erm.. a parakeet..


huh! gilo ke apo tetiba makcik nak jadi parakeet.. tapi itulah dia.. i feel like flying thru the clouds , while singing my heart out on the azure blue sky..
with my bright and attractive color, i m sure i m gonna get as much attention as i ve been dreaming on..
No no no.. dun get me wrong.. I m neither attention seeker not having a problem of attention deficit disorder (ADD).. Its just dat..
For once.. i wish tat i dun have all thse (megaHUGE) problems dangling in my minds.. was referring to tat major one.. ( nah.. not gonna mention it in ere)..
anyway.. on not much heavier note...
If i were given one more chance to seize my day.. ....
shud i or shud i not have nasik kerabu hitam for iftar again this evening?
(Hampehhh punya soalan kan)..
and i wonder.. whether parakeets love nasik kerabu or not? *pondering*..At least i shud have one thing in common with it.
Enuff about the birds...
Am thinking about the next trip.. tapi taktau mana.. Probably to a place called NeverNeverLand.. (just came across the name of Kyrgyz Republic when i visited MOSTI's website just now. Tot they misspelt the country's name. yet the country does exist in the world's map. I m just being ignorance as usual. .. not gonna elaborate more abt my 'ignorance' karang meraung jek kat sini nanti..
Hmm.. I d better do some works then.. Cam bagus jek kan.. berblogging2 kat sini.. even tho the files on my desk are mounting up..
Talk abt multitasking.. duhh..

this pic was taken when I was in Graz, Austria last September. It's been snapped by my Indonesian fren who's still doing her Phd in Leiden University. She did not attend this year congress which was held in Athens recently. But I did bump into a few familiar faces from last year's congress, and they cud still recognise me as the fractured armed lady.. kah kah kah.

Thursday, August 28, 2008

and I just realised..

dat i never feel like posting any pics in my blog, making my blog so dull n ugly kan?
and I also realised tat i m a silent reader to many blogs, which i d never bother to acknowledge my presence in their blogs.. well tat's me allrite...
but....
i also realised tat due to the reasons above.. nobody read my blogs.. I mean new readers.. well... maybe bcos this blog is a syok sendiri punya blog kan...
The 2 stooges kat fac tu pun.. tak penah tau their stooge-mate ni ada blog.. hahaha
WAT differ this blog with the other 2 stooges?...
ANSWER: i confide to them with all my personal matters but i wont confide in this blog..well sorry to say.. wat u read is wat u got.. which is only the exterior surface of moi...which only contribute 0.05% of the real makcik in real world actually...
which only... arghhh...
P told me once.. "u shud not do it too often u know"
Moi : shud not do wat?
P: talking to yrself.. if u still wanna do it.. go infront'f d mirror and talk to it..
Moi: well wats wrong wth talking to ourselves? I mean.. when i talk to myself.. u ll see me mumbling je.. if i talk out loud.. tat d be another story.. rite?
P: then do it infront'f d mirror
Moi: Nope..
P: itu lah u.. keras kepala.. never take other ppl advice
Moi: Does it make any diference.. i mean.. i d soliloquy anywhere, any place any time.. when i feel like it.. why do u wanna make it difficult for me by wanting me to TALK INFRONT OF THE MIRROR.. whenevr i feel like talking to myself.. I mean tat thing is spontaneous u know.. i wont just simply talking to myself if i dun hv any issue..
P: ok, when do u usually talk to yrself then?
Moi: Like now maybe .. (mumbling to myself: eee org tua nih.. byk songeh tul.. aku pelempang kang..."
P: sorry i didnt hear u..
Moi: see.. shud i find any mirror now.. can u find me a mirror.. or maybe this side mirror will do ( we re in the car when the conversation took place).. Opps.. toot.. time's up.. i m already done with the talking (moi grinning)
P: ok la u win.. ( buat muka "ada lori ada bas.. ada hari boleh balas")
Moi: showing her contented smile..
After a few minutes...
Moi; Bang, kita nak makan kat mana kejap agi..
P: Buat muka dono.. while ignoring me
Moi: Helloooo.. kita nak makan kat mana ni..( a bit louder tis time)
P: huhhh! r u talking to me?
Moi: ya la... nwho else is in this car?
P: Owhhh.. tot u r still talking to yrself....(with a wide grin smile)
Moi: &^%$J*&#$$@$%% ( PAYBACK TIME.. soonnn..)

Owh.. im thinking of posting a few pics here..well.. havent posted any pics for so long anyway..and here they are... jeng jeng

muka penat cam nak mati..( after more than 24 hrs atas flite + 8 hrs transit kat dubai) pas tu sesampai kat airport.. kununnya nak jadi adventurous.. tarik luggage naik metro to hotel.. ampeh takder pemandangan menarik pun along the way.. tapi ok la... we saved a lot by taking a train to the city


1st day kat athens.. while having our bfast at the bfast corner.. well since its free.. this is all wat we ate for bfast for the whole week there..


well first thing i did when we reached the conference place was looked for the posters room. put on our posters and snapped the pics of us beside the posters.. well they r the proofs tat we did attend the conference, mingled wth other particpants, made networking.. etc.. etc..


anyone cud tell me how to upload the pics along wth its caption to the blog in fastest way?. been uploading one pic at one time and added the caption above by typing it..( hate doing it in mundane way)..

well watever it is.. i ll upload more pics when i m in the mood again... haishhhh...

Sunday, August 24, 2008

And Life goes on..

First of all.. i m still here.. eyah eyahh..
tah.. tang mana nak gumbira haper tahh..
i went to the 'seminar keusahawanan' yesterday. Not tat i m so keen to be a future 'usahawan" but it was a seminar for those who took MGM3180 aka Asas keusahawanan in UPM. I m one of those who teaches this course.. which is so amazing la kan. bcos i never had any basic on this subject ( except for a 3 days 2 nites crash course tat they conducted last march).
It wasnt tat bad anyway. I mean the seminar. the speakers r the entrepenurs tat already had established businesses.. and I love the advice tat one of the speakers ie Dr zainul Azizan, the owner of Nagasteel equipment gave to the students who attended the seminar.
When he's been asked of "how to manage yr time" .. he'd just simply said.. To manage yr time.. 2 things tat u shud do are.. 1. off yr handphone.. 2. Off yr YM
which is so true la.. cos I have seen the effects of how thse two things have affected most of the workers in our country.. generally.
I have seen a freind who cant live without her hp and thinks tat she can multitask by doing her works n chatting at the same time...(no offence to ppl yg mmg cam tu ek)
There's one report which i read quite sometime ago.. on a survey and its been reported tat we re actually wasted 70% of our working (quality) time when we started checking our emails.. cos one thing will lead to another, rite? U wont just simply check yr email cos there'd be emails which link to some websites and u opened the websites , they will lead to other websites.. and it will go on.. There'd never be a stop for it..
and to quote wat dr zainul said.. " how r u gonna think of some ideas.. when u r engrossed with chatting to ppl who r online at the same time? "
That makes sense.. seriously. I mean.. I have stopped chatting while i work.. except.. I know I do have some time to do dat.. Most of the time I d be invisible.. and besides.. well im not as chatty as i used to be.. when there r always loads of work tta need to be done before deadline.. owhh well look who's talking.. aku pun kekadang terbabas jugakk.. kah kah kah
Ok la.. on lighter note.. I was free allday today. Pusat KOKO didnt call me for finishing school.. so melangok la aku kat umah.. cam bosan la plak if i had too much free time neyhh..
Uploaded the pics which i ve snapped when i was in Athens last time.. most of the pics were snapped by my freind.. and most of them r not interesting la... we snapped lotsa posters.. as there lotsa infos tat we can gain from em.
I missed the students.. n the class as well. They r gonna start operating their bizs this week. its part of the keusahawanan syllabus. haishh cam tak sabo la plak nak nengok dorang niaga. all the groups have already submitted their business plans but i havent got time to read em yet. i m having 2 appointments at HUKM next week. Tomorrow, i m off for Ortho and a Ct scan on tbursday. Cehh kalahkan pak dokter...
Gotta run.. i mean.. crawl ( kah kah kah).. lum solat n im supposed to be in bed already neyh... ubat lum makan...
well nitey nite nocturnals ( bukan aku ekk)

Friday, August 22, 2008

It cant be any lighter..

Well 12 days has passed since I last wrote in my blog. Lotsa things happened after md last 'transit' in Dubai ( which was happened to be a nitemare for me). I mean LOTSAAA things.. which.. I dun think I have neither the time nor the energy to spin the yarn to my few-kerat readers here.
But i just want to narrate abt wat happened to me this morning..
Which make 'my blood go upstairs" ...
and make me realised how patience i cud be, when confronting this kinda situation..
and I also realised.. whenever i becam mad like hell.. the only resort was to cool myself down by... ermm.. (clearing my throat).. weeping..
yeah.. me so PATHETIC..
wait till u hear the second part of the story.. I m sure u d all crying bucketss..
well.. to start a story, we ( me and my P (which stands for Pakcik, no,.. not U .. incik Shahe).. decided to go to the postoffice.. after having our bfast at kedai mamak. I ve just checked my mailbox a nite before ( with tears streaming on my chubby cheek, and tat will be anothr story okkayy) and found out tat I got an undelivered reg letter, and due to dat, i have to go to Seri Kembangan Post Office , at their kaunter serahan tingkap to obtain the letter.
We parked at a 'secluded' area ( la sangat).. thinking tat no car wud dare to block our car.. by parking their cars behind ours..
UInfortunately.. we were so WRONG. there was this silver Nissan Sentra, and her stupid owner has happily parked her car just behind our car. which is so ridiculous la kan. bcos there is no WAY that we can leave without she removed her car first..
Thinking tat the owner must be somewhere around, P went inside the post office , trying to look for the owner.. later on, he went to all the shops opposite the post office. One hour has passed but still there easnt any sign of the bloody owner. I was late for work anyway.
I even had this tot tat 'she' ( we re very sure ttat the owner must be a SHE) is doing his facial at the beauty salon nearby ( spotted one or two) opposite the post office, while both of us r waiting impatiently for her to come. after 1.5 hours, we ended up our waiting.. with the arrival of AHSO bangang outta nowhere, i think she went to the bank which is like 1/2 km away from the parking place.
and her first q was like ( while pointing to our car).. "Yours arr?" I didnt get the chance to curse her anyway.. bcos P was much quicker than me..
" so stupid! everyone says U r stupid.. u must be born stupid!" sorta.. and before i cud add to his stupid vocabularies, she has already gone!
Should have told her.. not even stupid.. u r also blind!
so much for the tot la kan...

on heavier note.. ( well there is like.. heaviest as well)..
We went to yankies Hut for dinner last nite.. I was not well yesterday ( tat will be another story too).. ermm i ll just cut the story short..
Mom called when we were abt to go back.. and i cried after the phone call.. Goddit?

ok.. here's the last one.. on heaviest note...
I was very bz after coming back from Athens.. I mean.. like bziest.. Touched down at 12.. got my luggage and all.. and i safely reached home at 2 am.. and the next morning.. I had a lecture at 2 pm.. need to prepare the lecture notes as well..
and my my.. how do u call yrself.. after a long trip of more than 24 hours.. withoutany proper rest.. ( remind me not to transit at dubai again)..
i cant even open my eyes..
and on Tuesday.. i have an appt with my beloved Rheumy.. and they have decided to start a new drug via infusion on me.. meaning tat I need to spend a nite in d ward.
which I have done dat.. been there.. last monday.
Again.. they didnt have any vacant bed for me.. so I have to wait. Just imagine.. i ve been in HUKM since 9.30 but at 4.30 pm.. i m still not able to be admitted. and they finally put me in at half past six. I was so dead tired at dat time.. and then.. after the usual check up by the MO, they discovered a huge mass in my womb.. so the mission is now changed.. next day i was put for ultra sound, xray.. gynae clinic bla bla.. and yes.. all these while, i am living with a huge ovarian tumour inside myself for God knows, how long...
well.. did have dysmenorhea frequently. and this feeling of bloatness sometimes.. well.. was thinking tat it must be due to my irregulare eating habit..and this superficial massed thingy.. well i dunno.. i blamed on my ignorance la..
I was discharged last wednesday.. have to go again next week for a CT scan and next.. i dunno.. the gynae will decide I guess.
I have another nitemare.. before i d be able to be discharged. well not gonna tell u anyway.. just remind me to get my MC from tat HO lembab itu.. she forgot to give me one.. tho i have requested it beforehand..
owh.. i forgot.. they have like tonnes of things to do kan.. HO la katakan..
well i ll tell u if there is another double heaviest note in my entry..
The only thing tat I have to remind myslef again n again.. Allah has put me into test once again.. So watever it is.. redha jek la dgn ujian yang ALlah beri ni..
kan...
Semoga makcik ini akan dimasukkan dalam golongan org yang sabar dan redha dengan ketentuan Nya.. I ll accept watever the outcomes anyway..
Hmm.. I dunno.. when wud be the next entry.. kalau ini the last one.. ( tho I m really looking fwd to posting the next one)... well this is it..
Au Revoir.. and.. kenang daku dalam doa mu.. ekkk

kih kih kih..

Sunday, August 10, 2008

In Dubai again

ahlan wa sahlan from dubai..yeah.. im now in dubai airport at 4.42 am(MYT), 12.43 am(Dubai Time) and 11.43 pm ( Athens time). Anthr 8 hrs to go b4i d be able to board. Gila bosan aku, dah le emirates hampeh takbagi aku hotel voucherjust bcos i m only economy class passenger. Udah le, terminal dia dah setahun tak siap2 renovate, asal sampai jek kena turun tangga naik bas pi terminal.. Nasib baik jek entertainment dlm flite bagus..kalau idak dah lama aku hantar surat layang kat emirat4es ni..
I amsoo exhausted,checked out at 11 am tis morning and went straight to airport.. the flite departed at 5.30 ( supposed to depart at 4.40 tapi ada la manusiamana yg tak gheti2.. tinggalhand luggage tapi tuannya pi shopping) sampai the pilot siap cakap.. u have my permission to give them the dirty looks when they came..the cabin vrews siap bagi round applause lagik once they entered the cabin hahaha.
Funny,this morning,i was at the greek cafe nearby,sipping greek coffee while listening to some greek pop songs, life seeemed blissful at tat time,how i wish i cud have many other precious momemnts like thismorning.and tonite i am in dubai airport.. thousands ppl allover the world r walking infront'f me now..and tomorrow morning,i d be in the tutorial room,delivering lecture to mystudents.. Now it doesnt sound like the usual routine..it sounds more like living on a fast lane kan..kah kah kah...
Sekali sekala leh la wat cam tu.. cuba tiap2 bulan like my bro.. ada la yg tertiarap tgh jalan karang..
I am now trying to stay awake with a can of pepsi,some crackers and a bottle of mineral water..
I miss my crib ( kater incik Shahe) so much... my "Pakcik".. kirim perfume..so tadi sempat merayau2 cari.. its much cheaper than the one i asked in Athens..
I spent yesterday, strolling around the places nearby..ended up 'shopping' kat Hondos Centre. tapi takshopping pun.. later i found a supermarket which is actually behind the hotel buildinhg.. cett..dah nak balik baru jumpa... purchased some greek coffee and toffee for the kids..
Owh btw,while i was walking to the shopping centre yesterday,when a guy managed to catch me and guess wat? i shrieked a bit thinking that he'sgonna pickpocket me.. but he handed me a 10 euro note and squished it onto my palm instead..Tak sempat aku nak cakap apa2 dia dah lari...
hahaha he must think tat ilooked a bit forlorn wanderinng around the places... well dah selamat duit tu aku guna for d lunch.
owhh... batt dah kong.. cess... tak sempat aku nak tulis byk2..wat am i gonna do for the next 7 hours ni....huwaaaaaa....
some arab monsters r preying my seat now...maunya aku tak berganjak dr tempat duduk ni...