one crappy email

a few minutes ago i receives an email from a friend cum exbf cum mentor cum ntahhapa2. he, by all means only replies my email once in an orange moon , yet he made me as im the one who shud be blamed here for not keeping in touch.. so this is my anser to his poorah email...

blah le pakcikkksuka ati moyang tiri jiran dia jek nak balas ke tak balas email ni.. skit2 sampai ati.. as if i were the guilty party.. dia yg tak balas email sebenonya.. bukan kita atau mereka2 yg kat luar bangunan parlimen tu

btw, im going back to KB tomorrow for a week.. bosan duk sini.. kawan tadak.. penat pun penat.. penat perasaan.. huhuhuh

anyway.. sesi showing off ni.. i ve purchased meself a laptop with a built in wireless.. so most weekends i ll be at BU wireless-ing away from particular locations such as dalam toilet, atas tilam, atas sofa, bawah katil.. as i am WIRELESSLY connected.. yeah.. bangganyaa

to add some more 'boastiness", they have given me a free webcam when i purchased that 'baby" ( im calling my notebook as baby nowadays), so lately , whienever im online, i ll make sure that the webcam is on and I lll either capture any static images infront of me ( and that is include tudung saji, mugs, tombol pintu etc), unfortunately i m still webcam-shy heheheh

so.. till then , im off to tanah serendah sekebun bunga early tomorrow morning..

and pakcik...

blahhhhhh la lu.. u never keep any promises of yrs.. maleh dahhh

P.S im back to single status now.. bosan bosan bosan..
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

From: "udin aziz"
To: sitisifir@hotmail.com
Subject: Memorandum Toklehtarikbalik
Date: Fri, 27 Jan 2006 07:05:23 +0000
>SAMPPPPAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIII HATIIIIIIIIIIIII...senyap terus...
>sedap nya syoru padang raggut sampai lupa kat kita di Gua
>Tempurung...mak tiri pun tak bikin cam nee... so bila nak kunjung
>balik ke Bandarhijau...Rinduuuuu...cam nak com.
>Muaaaaahhhh>



oh watdda heack.. if tis is how u wrote to a professor, dah lama dah aku kena buang daerah.. but then serve him rite.. heheh

the 18th niece

so the saturday has come again.. yesterday, kak ina has delivered a baby gal at 4.59 pm. whom weighed 3.69 kg at Pantai medical centre. Ergo, abg li is now a proud daddy of Puteri Aina. ???? (the 2nd name is not decided yet). being lazy and demoted as usual, tho its not as bad as the manic wednesday, i ve succeededly in updating my prev lecture notes ( i have made it a bit colorful, with pictures and all, anthr smart attempt to assure the students wont be dozing off in my class, heeee)
anyway here i am, at abg li's , wireless-ing all the way from its living hall, maybe i shud try surfing from the toilet next time hahaha.
amal is now beside me trying to peep into what his che ngah been doing, hehhee and in the mean while he's been to n fro from the kitchen ( now he's doing some gargling sound infront me nyeh nyeh)
anyway, far has invited me to her hse tis afternoon, and i ll be having m lunch there. looks like nobody is gonna send me over, guess i ll be taking a cab then. and tomorrow, is aleya's bday.. and oh btw, the u know who picked me up from my hse to bu early tis morning and thru the journey, we didnt talk at all. I dunno, as i ve been so bluntly sent him smses, nasty ones actually, accusing him for being manipulator, etc.. ( i know i know.. i shudnt have said tat) but i was furiously mad at him for neither replying my smses nor ansering any of my calls) yes.. i told u i m very temperamental.. so.. being so frustrated yesterday, i went up and talked to Mrs H for a while in her room and the accompanied her to lunch ( i had my lunch earlier), so when i came back, there were 2 missed calls, one from him and anthr one one was an unfamiliar no.. he called me again afterwards , informing that he's picking me up tomorrow..
well i ve told my single mommy housematey that iwont be talking to him.. its gonna be a silence journey.. and indeed it is..
and last nite i was back to my old habit, chatting til the wee hr, infact i called China for 1 1/2 mins.. bad bad me.. i shudnt vent out my anger by having rebound relationship.. ooooo im so so badd..
wat shud i do la.. shud i continue tis relationship.. or shud i give him antnhr chance till march? ( after all tat's wat i ve told him when he started courting me)..deep inside i still have this affection towards him.. but ... arghhhhh....
i ll say no more...

the imbalance hormones

I dunno why but this is the most dullest day in my life ( maybe i shud blame it to my imbalance hormone or 'tis time of the month". I dun feel like working and i actually have set it in my mind ( since last nite) that I m not sitting for hours in that crowdy office ( who am i kidding) and i need some spaces and go out exploring (literally saying that I feel like ponteng kije today heheh)

so when its not working as my mind planned, i ve gone a bit haywired. I have become a capricious person.. yes! tats' me . im changing from a very nice, timid, kontrol ayu person to a very nasty, irritating, 'cari gaduh' and jaki jipang lady.. whoaaaa...

so these are the things that i ve been doing for the past few hours.. ( yes I m baddd )

It all happened after i tried to write an article tat need to be submitted to any scientific journal out there ( im stll struggling to write for just a few lines till I discovered that Im too lazy to dig into any previous reports of mine, so i left it hanged, like i was having a writer block or something..)

when im bored i ll play with my hp, trying to figure out any potential victims tat will take pity on my boredom..

the 1st sms to a potential victim sounded like tis " im so booringggg today. No friend to talk to, no activity, unable to go anywhere too.. tis boredom is killing me.. helppp"

so when this potential victim (PV)ansered, he was actually trying to console me, "go and rest at home then"

Yes, he's into it now.. the 2nd sms -" nope, i ll feel guilty afterwards, no good no good, why dun u pick me up and we ll have lunch somewhere, *batting my eyelashes*

PV: im afraid it is impossible, traffic jam kat KL at the mo.. perhaps some other time

Me: ok.. nvm

abt 12 minutes later - my 2nd attempt. ( dun blame me.. u cant expect my hormone will return to normal after 30 minutes)

me to PV: Iam so boring I feel like crying. I miss my days when i was in bandar I before ( fishing for sympathy)

PV: sabarlah..

me to PV: Dah le i dun need any consolation. let me wallow in self pity. Bosan.. boring.. bosannyaaaa

PV: So wat can i do to ease yr boredom? tell me? ( ok i ve to admit, PV is dementedly worried now, he might think that i m gonna jump from the 13th floor due to my boredom)

Now, i was exaggerating..

Me: just ignore my rambling. Im bored with my life too. Nak balik pun kena jalan kaki. Bosan!There's no progress in my life. There's nothing dat i can be proud of. I am so depressedddd ( ok.. so there's a pinch of fact in it)

PV: lets get married then.

Me: Nak kawin ngan apa? except for your car, u have nothing to offer me. Im bored with tis relationship. I shud have told u long time ago.. bosan bosann

yes, i am a bit**. I know, i shudnt have said tat.. but ... ( its unexplained)

PV: enuff said. Even if u dun need me anymore, u dun have to insult me. If i cant make u happy, sorry.. but please, dun say hurtful things. be considerate. Go find life that u wanna be in..

Ok.. I should have stopped here, but i did not. I went on and on letting out everything that have been mounting up in my mind for these past few weeks.

I ve succeeded in hurting him, mentally.

but i m so relieved now.. these things have been bugging off my mind for days.. I wanna tell him tho I knew , we will end up hurting ourselves.. *sighing*

and Im still blaming it on the imbalance hormones...

wat should I do now? Take back my words?

I am a BAD woman.. (can actually picturing Michael Jackson singing his voice out, "U r bad u r bad" while pointing his index finger to my face)

yes, I m more than tat.. Im WORST!

Its my Life..

First and foremost...
I m feeling sleepy again.. its 3 pm and i m thinking of the other ppl's blogs which i envy bcos, i found out that lotsa bloggers have been leading hectics and glamorous lives and me here, i dun have much to tell..
Come to think of it.. I shud have been grateful.. no need to get jealous with other ppl ( tho deep in my heart, i am.. indeed)YET...
i am grateful.. for waking up each morning , thnk GOD for still giving me a chance to breathe the fresh air..( i cant complain for the painful/ swollen ankles tho as I ve been 'in' it forever)
i am much indebted for HIM, since being the unhealthy and weak person i am, i can still obtained my highest achievement, regardless my sorrow, tears, agony etc via living with RA for the past 25 years.
A blessing in disguise....
the memory of me in a wheel chair , wallowed in my self-cocoon, depression surrounded, they r still fresh in my mind. Its been 15 years tho, when i have to set foot again at the univ, being the first year again for the 2nd time, being alone for the 2 1/2 years.. it was not easy tho.. All of your friends are in their final year while u were still struggling in yr 1st year to catchup all the times wasted for almost 3 years...
The years followed when i did my master wasnt bad tho. I managed to do it within 1 1/2 years and did a 3months attachment in Seoul..
then the hardest years started again.. i went thru some natural catastrophes during my doctorate years.. the health been going ups n down during this time. but in the end i have made it..
and for all of these precious experiences and priceless efforts, I thank HIM..
.. and i ve finaly realised, i dun need to be jealous of other ppl's lives.. infact, mine is luckier than those victims in the neighboorhood country, this is my life as Jon Bon Jovi said,.. and yes.. this is my life...
to quote a Robert Frost's..
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference….

Rain Rain Go awayyy..

I always wait till the end of the wrking day to scribbled up something in tis blogga mine. I dunno, perhaps i love the adrenalin rush feeling, doing something in the last minutes. the actual thing is, i nvr did tat. except for the things that i may have taken for granted right from the start. so i am benefiting thse few minutes before the school bell rings to write something short and memorable.. hope Phil will be reading this...
Bak aka dad came to KL last weekend and we did send him safely via airasia ( i managed to confirm the ticket a few hrs before the departure, and tis reminds me of the POOR service of the guestsupprt service of AIRasia! a few days ago, after having problem with the transaction when i booked the tickets online, i tried emailing Airasia concerning the matter. and idid get a quick reply telling me that their staff will attend my problem asap. so i waited for a few days to no avail. I emailed again, and tis time with capital letters, but still i got no reply. Then i called its call centre, someone did anser my call and before i cud inform the details any further, i ve been left with the irritating ad voice in the phone for ages. as i was using a prepaid, i cant endure the wait any longer so i just hung up. The next day, i tried calling again and tis time nobody ansered. been calling for many times, and all i got was the autoanser and the ad voice over and over again. due to that i asked my bro to drop by at the Klsentral and asked the airasia sales counter there. Thank GOD, the ticket has finally been confirmed. I really hate doing thing last minutes, especially when bak too is involved in it.
so we went to KLIA and i had my CNY tickets confirmed as well at the airasia sales booth over there.
i brought along my male laptop to abg li's and while we were fighting over whose turn to be online, as afif wanted to check his emails and amir kept on listening to the group that sing 'numb" ( cant recall the band's name at the mo), i remembered my notebook can actually do the wireless thingy.. yeahhh... so it has detected two wireless connection ie are abg li's and anthr one , i think iits from the OU's. so i was happily browsing thru it, till abg li came back and configured my laptop to its wireless band.. ( not really literate abt this thingy..)
the next day, i had an early start to serdang, abg managed to find a room around tat area, which is close to my hse now, and he can only move in when the month ends,
anyway, currently he's been sending me to my workplace every morning and i still have to walk back home tho.. ( the good thing from my daily walk is, i d be able to put off a few kg , hopefully.. )
its raining now, and i m desperately wanting to go home before its getting too dark.. hmm which reminds me of.. my plan to start taking driving lesson.. been proscrastinating the idea for like 6 months alreday..
P.S heavy downpours out there still.. how am i going back? helppp!!!!!
“For now, these hot days, is the mad blood stirring.” -Benvolio, Romeo and Juliet

The Male Laptop

when was the last time that i blogged? Hmm.. must be a week ago when i ve been very bored with all the undoneworks . ( gosh.. wat am i thinking, it only a 6 hrs-lectures and i ve been like, flipping thru every pharmacology books in the world)
Its not a good feeling tho, thinking of how am i gonna give a lecture infront of 70 smart students( not that i ve never give lectures before, but last time, i categorized my students as "not so smart" students, ya ampuun..so all the lectures have been delivered by not "100% well prepared me". i ve been thinking, maybe I shud attend some courses, regarding tis matter. and I will always have tis nervous and butterflies in my stomach feeling everytime i am giving lectures..
enuff abt that... so wat did i do for these past few days?
oh ok.. i m now a proud owner of a "twinhead notebook" (beaming), and i ve been exaggerating to my nephews that "note book che ngah can do everything, its a wireless and i d be able to surf internet while sipping a cup of latte at starbuck.. hihih".. well its not news anymore as everyone has been doing that for the last couple of years, its the 'in thing' nowadays..
anyway, i dun find it impressive tho, when u saw someone with his/her notebook at any wireless zone,,they might have been chatting at that time for all we knew.. hahaha.. and to think that they looked so sophisticated, sipping while doing business.. duhh.. ( i promised myself i m not gonna appear in public with situation like tat)
when i told David that i ve actually bought a brand new laptop, the conversation went like this .. ( ohh.. btw David is actually a friend of mine who's building lotsa digi tower all around msia so that digi will get more ...coverages.. hurray to DIGI..)
D: wat brand is yr notebook?
Me: a Twinhead
D: so U bought a male laptop? hahahaha
Me: ?
D: well, its a TWINHEAD for heaven sake
Me: yes.. so?
D: so its ubiquitously a man's possession.U know the one that is already there when a male is born..
Me:Ok.. so everybody got a head when he/she is born.. its not only for a male..
D: well.. a man is born with 2 heads,, which is a twin la..hahahahah
Me: (still confused.). and i still dun get it.. cud u at least xplain it in a simple english.. or am i the dumb one in ere?
D: well.. a male has a nthr head u know.. in malay word they called it kepala.. *****( sensored)
Me: ohh... oh well.. ( embarassed) trying to stiffle some giggling sounds..

so tat was it.. i am a proud owner of a "male" laptop.. and i shud be proud of it.. yayyyyyyy!

the 6th day of 2006...

Greetings.. and 1st of all. happy new year 2006 to each of us..
may this year brings u many many prosperous years ahead, tremendous life ever..
any way.. i m at work, trying very hard to open my eyelids..and behind me, i can hear the kakak cleaners vaccuming the places all over..
sat.. nak beri laluan kat achi cleaners doing theirworks ..
oh well.. i have to admit, i m too lazy to update my blog nowadays.. there r things happened to me, tho, interesting-not-so mundane thingy i must say.. but then..
as i said.. I cant be bothered anymore..
other than going back and forth from work.. i ve other things to do, weekends will be spent lepaking at my bro;s in BU. ( i m not going back tis wekeend tho, as i ve promised myself i can only lepak there on raya haji.. dpends on whether kak Ina lum meletup lagi or not..
this nasik tomato which i had just now.. has made me so sleepy.. i went outside for awhile just now while waiting for the cleaners to finish vaccuuming.. and i saw astrikingly psycehdelic green colored bas passed by infront the fac.. ( must be the univ bus), reminds me of my old days in UKM, when i did my masters there. During the 1st year, i decided to stay in the campus due to my health problem. when i was on my 2nd year, i rented a flat at sec1 BBB with kak aishah ( wonder where is she now), Transport in BBB in the 90s was quite rare, therefore we had to depend on univ bus. being me, to climb its 'tangga' was like climbing the everest. everytime i waited for the bus, i wud pray that the bus will have a lower tangga instead. There were a few undergrad students who were snobbishly insinuated me. jahat itu org.. bukannya nak tolong, ngata lagi ada le... anyway life in UKM in the 90s was indeedly an unforgetabble experience of the life time
have i mentioned that i wanna buy a laptop? my bro and i have gone thru some catalogs and hesuggested that i buy either dell or acer. I need a lighter notebook which is less than 2kg but then the lighter it is, the more expensive it ll be. maybe i cud decide if i just go straight to lowyat and willingly surrender under the influences of the sales reps recommendation.. the thing is,, i am a pc illiterated.. need some advice here tho..
im still yawning.. and i m experiencing anthr writer;s block now..hmm maybe i shud stop and catch my 40winks surrounded by these ppl.. who cares...

countdown to 2006

yes,, its been a long week tho.. and i ve opened tis site of mine so many times but at the end i was having writer's block .. so i just closed the site without scribbling anything in tis blog..
well.. in not more than 12 hours we ll be stepping to anthr year, 2006. infact i havent planned of any new year resolution yet.. but i have a few ideas in tis mind already.. ( dun wanna put it in ere) let them stick in this brain of mind till then end of 2006, and then, i ll let u know whether i ve achieved all those or not..
I had a bad day last week.. after berpoya-poya with abg, we went to morib and had my dinner there. and the next day, i got sick. kena ketulahan ponteng kerja kot.. or maybe i ve been slapped by one of those puteri bunian in pantai morib..
so we went to the clinic and the doc suspcted that i got gastric, due to all the synptoms, feeling nausea and all..
arghh i have to stop writing and continue later.. lotsa interruptions at the mo... the niece and nephews.. who else... erghh

Tis pathetic feeling....

so its weekend already. and as usual im back at BU. Its not that like i planned for but, the Single mommies (SM) housemateys have left for bangkok early tis morning. As I ll be alone in the house, I ve decided to follow abg to BU as he's coming to serdang too tis morning. so we left quite early, missed a turn ( like alwasy infront the kommuter station ), and we only arrived at BU almost an hour later. Tot of using the short-cuts la konon.. abg tho has to go to work at 9ish and only finished work 12 hrs later..:(
and its gonnna be a long 3 days( if i were left alone , without any agenda) . hmmm... isnt it weird.. a 30ish woman like me, doesnt even have any plan during weeeknds? eeewwwww.. sound so pathetic rite?
well thats me.. the pathetic ida.. who doesnt have any life other than her works..
hmm.. I need a new handbag for work tho.. but.. Im too lazy to shop alone.. not that i ll be needing 2nd opinion but there r times that i dun feel like being too independent..and most of my friends.. are all married.. have kids etc..
and again im feeling sorry to myself... sob sob..

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog.

.. and the mood is ruined again today

I woke up with the worst pain at my left abdomen, and i was thinking whether the 'kidney stone attack" has struck back. 2 years ago , a week before i underwent for my TKR surgery, i had an undescribable bout of kidney attack, it was so painful and at tat time i tot that i ve cysts in my ovary ( based on wat kakfarah told me la). so tis morning i was a bit confused, whether the pain was basically from my kidney or my fallopian tube..as i m having my menses now..
so i slept back till 7ish, thinking of getting MC, but then, it doesnt make sense.. i have just started working 2 weeks ago, i cudnt take a medical leave just bcos i m having my menstrual pain..duhhh
anyway the pain fade off as i kiasu-edly took a ponstan..and as i ve been ensconcedly reading the chapters. he sms-ed saying dat he cudnt get the car today,,,
so the war begins again.. ( i really dun feel like writing wat we ve quarelled about) but the only thing that i cud recall in his sms, is, he dare to mention"kepala bapak" to me..
huwarhhhh... i m finished with him.. really... and tis time is for real.. i just cudnt take it anymore... ( well i know i m wrong ) but... my ego took over..
I D RATHER BE ALONE FOREVER.. hati pun tak sakit cam ni.. cesssssssssssss

The frozen sanctum

Guess wat! I ve succeeded in changing my blog template ( and i tot all these while they created it by themselves) yeyyy! and u can just dloaded it from any free blog tenplate sites.. ( budusnya aku selama ni)
Nothing much tho.. I ve finally made a pact with U -know-who. Come to think of it.. it's all started with a tiny incident, i caught him not going to friday prayer.. and it made me madddd like hell.. ( not that im pious or watsoever, but not to go to the mosque just bcos u didnt realize wat the time is.. is so so totally of out laymen's question. and I ma so so pissed off with that kinda men
so it was a 3 days silence for me, I wud have prolonged the period if he didnt start sms-ing me and made me roaring like a fierce lioness again.. grrrrr..
maybe im too choosy as he said.. and a bad tempered person like me.. nobody cud stand except him..
yesh.. he is defintely rite.. but how am i supposed to do? i was born to become a temperamental woman , but never i throw tantrums infront the respected crowds..
actually tis is more like.. keeping mounds of tempers inside ... any day.. it will explode.. and i feel sorry for the ones who's beside me when the catastrophe happened.. huhh
hurayyy.. my salary is banked in today... i ve only worked less than 2 weeks in here ( minus the hours that i went back early) and i have been paid already? kudos to the U*M
btw, im having dysmenorrhea today.. a mild one, but with me freezing here, i dun think i d be able to stand it any longer..
im still catching up with the antiepilepsy notes.. remind me of the early months i was in ipoh.. as I havent had enough time to do my notes, I ll just cut n paste it into my powerpoint presentation and tried to digest em along the students.. Its not me tho.. or else i wont waste a whole solid year just to write up my thesis.. aahh citer lama.. taknak kenang lagi dah ehhh
too lazy to climb up to the office. being here, i finally realised that there is no single facility within this level.. i need to go to 3rd level for its toilet, 2 blocks away for the meal, etc ( am not complaining) i dun want em to find this blog of mine and identifying its owner.. mati gue...

The mind rambling war..

Guess wat! tis is my 3rd week in UPM and i still feel a so so left out.. Dunno y.. cos last time when i was in ipoh, i only took a week to become 'normal' again. even just now, i heard someone mentioned my name and when i showed myself.. nobody seemed to notice.. uwaaa.. am i becoming invisible again?
I really hate tis feeling.. oh yes, i admit i am timid, very quiet person especially when i havent known anyone yet.. and I need ppl to start the balls rolling on first!
I cant make the first move.. and y? cos it so happened to be like tat ever since iwas in my mom's womb.. I cant just say hi to ppl that i only knew and started rambling like they r all my old friends..
I just cant!!
Tis is me.. and i feel so alone today..
and now that im working.. i m feeling so terrible..
It wasnt tis awful when i did my Phd in UM a few years back..
as I still have those lab animals that i can talk with..
even my jaw feels so tight cos i havent uttered any single word yet since i sit here at 8.20 am tis morning..
GOD.. i need to break the silence.. icebreaking moment..
Pleaseeeeeeee..
Im going crazy here...
help... and i mindesperate need of all those virtual chats so tat i can be myself for a while

HELP ME!!!!!!!!!
maybe i shud make the first move.. ppl say to break the ice u shud bring some cookies and offer em to all of the members in the room u occupied..
Ok.. so watshud i bring then?
i want my ipoh colleagues back laaaa.. they r somehow r fun to be with..
ooo.. just bcos i m not an exstudent here.. never studied here..
and only came here to be a staff...they r all ignoring me..
are they.. or maybe im the one who looks like i dun want to befriend themm
hmmm...
and y at tis fossil age of mine, i m still having tis crappy issue that became a no 1 prob in my life...
how long will i take to adapt myself in here? 2 months? 2 weeks ( passsed already) or 2 yearss!
maybe i shud chew lotsa chewing gum so that i ll be a freindly lady to get along with..
but nobody has been complaining before.. and i have no prob with my 2 single mommies hsemates..
so why do i feel like.. i m the anne the orphan here..
atleast she has a rich foster dad..
ohh... im trying to digest the while text infront of me now.. but to no avail..
i ve been reading abt antidepressant.. and im now a lil depressed myself..
maybe i shud take one or two pills that looks slurpy enough in tis txtbook

yes.. i m getting crazy..now i knew.. y those plane crashed survisors on the isolated island get crazy after sometime..
and yes.. i might be talking abt the LOST, the tv series..
see i told ya.. i ve been jumping from one subject to anthr... and yes.. i might need the Faculty Dean to examine me..
and all i need now is a change of place.. maybe i shud beg dr Pat to give me the room which Hasiah will unoccupy real soon...
yes.. at least i can continue my habit of talking to the wall..
it will let my stress out a bit..
oooo... these ppl.. whay shud i do to make them welcome and talk to me like they talk to other colleagues?
uwaaa.... im idea-less now...
and i ll be having my lunch alone as well.. huh...
maybe i shud invite a few aliens from anthr planet to join in..
yes... the ones with green and red tentacles.. or the ones who can imitate trees when they r not moving..
maybe i shud have my lunch in their planet myself... so tat i can learn their warmth traditionally welcome to newcomers like me..
YES! the newcomer...
arent they suppose to organise a lunch for me so tat i cud feel welcomed?
arent theyy?
well.. if ever happened that there will be more new staffs coming laters. i ll give em a great welcome..
will treat em for nice lunches and will tell em how misreable i am during the first few weeks i was here..
yes.. maybe university shud introduce some subjects abt it too..
and i ll be the one who ll enrol the class..
yes.. i need to change my so cold manner to some warmth hearty huggable greets..
maybe i shud be a McDonald nya icon.. huwahuhwahuwaa

The weeekend's wedding

Actually, i was planning not to go home ( home is BU) tis weeekend. As i cud picture me lepaking again in the midst of chaotic house, with amal yelling , "umi... angah bukak ps2" and amir with his non stop "cikngah,, nak dengar ringtone'' urghh...
and maybe Kak Ina is bored with my presence every weekend, who knows..
but then i ve promised the old classmates tat i will attend liza wok's weeding reception tomorrow.
The only wedding that i m attending for the past 10 years.. hahaha
so the changed of plan.. i ll 'ponteng' kije tis afternoon ( by walking out early today la).. macam tak biasa.. as i need to catch various malaysian public transports to BU tis afternoon. Dr M will be proud of me as I ll be using the commuter, the lrt and the cab before reaching BU. ( bus will be out due to its disabled unfriendly stairs)
talking abt commuter, i had an awful incident last weekend during my commuter trip to KL sentral. ( remind me not to take a commuter at peaks hrs on weeeknds). I had to stand all the way to sentral, with all the congested passengers. and someone did manage to place his hand on my butt.. erghhhh.. and it so happened that the owner of the hand was a man whom i mistook for a boy.. he was so short and i feel like bashing his head afterwards..
grr..due to tat, i m planning to catch an earlier commuter today.. nobody;s picking me up.. how sad..
hopefully tis hip of mine wont give me so much trouble today.. i dun want to wake up flinching all day in liza's wedding tomorrow..
come to think.. am i really going to liza's tomorrow? tis is not so me.. the unsocialable me who always refuse to attend in any old school reunion..
and liza said, tomorrow is supposed to be anth reunion for the 85 batch as well..
makkkkkkkkkkk...

The Batik Day

It is not an awsome experience tho, being in tis inner sanctum of mine, surrounded by annonymous faces, while the air conditioned blowing straight at my face, i fee l so alone ..
there 's no more chatty me as I dun know anyone from here,( its hard tho making friends here, must be bcos they r in 'another' generation or i ve potrayed myself as a very timid and quiet person ( thus, no one dare to talk to me )
and its been a few days that i ve walked back all the way from the fac to home.. its no more a long trip, and i take abt 10-15 mins to reach home ( good for my health i guess).. I have a vision that within next few months I ll be come the next elle mc pherson yippeeeee...
anyway.. today's a 15th of the month, and its a batik wearing day.. thank God i manage to rummage my inorganised closet and found a few old batik attires ( tat i used to wear during my old school days).. so to day i am a "lady in hijau pucuk pisang" hehehe

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After a week..

so, here i am after a week working at a new place called UPM. Since they havent given me any work yet ( my life is revolved around registrar office, blok A of the fac and it always end up with me having my lunch and later walking back straight back home.. quite a tiring trip tho.) so I guess, i ll be really 'working' next week when i d already gotten a pc, since they have provided me the syylabus of wat Im gonna teach next sem ( and tat will be like, 2 weeks away.. gulp..)im in dire need of the precious pc,, how to create lecture notes maa.. if i dun get any..
housemates are all ok.. and since they are all single mom ( just found out that Za has married before, got a 2yrs old daughter who is living with her mom ) i ve been hearing all the tragic stories of their previous marriage and the evilness of their ex hubbies.
so, i am now having pre traumatic syndrome of geting married. Looks like the men in this world are all evil, referring to Za's ex hubby , a bit devilish to refer to Na's ex womanizing hubby.. erkkk
so.. the weekend has been filled with me, loitering at abg li's hse as usual.. and monday is a public holiday for selangor state ( told u, i ll be having lotsa public holidays when i m working in selangor)
atrip to Pj yesterday was a bit exhausting and feet-killing when i have to stand all way in the commuter and then again when the trip continued by lrt from KL sentral to Kelana Jaya.. so i m now having a post-pain with all my muscles feel like been hit by some sumo wrestlers.. luckily tomoorow is a public holiday..
went to OU with kak ina, had lunch at cafe1920 and we were like forgetting our times over there with crowds getting larger after lunch hour.
i m all out after 6.. tired and the shoulder blades is killing me ..
sigh.. and i wonder how other women can go window shopping all day without getting any physical pain...

all rest and no works....

hmmm too much lepak tis week.. if i m not going out, i ll be sleeping hours in the afternoon.. hmm bad habit.. ill be in trouble when i ll start working next week..
so i ve done my medical check up.. the doc wrote a lot in the medical report.. regarding my RA and certain deformities.. and i ve found out that i m a ctually a diabetic u waaaa..
lotsa sugar content in my urine ( and it wasnt due to me taking breakfast before i went to the clinic)
lotsa sugar.. tats wat doctor said.. ( no wonder i ll pee frequently at nite, and i tot its due to iced drinks that i took earlier)..
had lunch with abg at vivo in the afternoon.. and then he sent me back home..was mad at him regarding an incident before tat, so i let out my anger via chatting.. served him rite.. didnt call or take any calls from him..yeah.. i was so so pissed off of wat he tried to do to me earlier..and the next morning he called..
and i only ansered his call at the 3rd attempts.. so he said he wont say sorry before but he did.. even told me he didnt sleep a wink tat nite.. hahhaahah..
well this stubborn ida won again...

Not so new place ..

so.. i m in PJ now.. not going back to ipoh anymore.. went to HUKM for the yearly appt with ortho ( tho actually i m in desperate need of mc.. hehehe.. the ortho surgeon looked at my knee for a while , asked me to cat walk infront of his students, asked me whether i m not aware the existence of a piece of metal in my patela ( tho i ve disappointed him with my anser, i said yes hehehe), asked me wat i ve been doing for the past 15 months, and then he said that he wil see me again after a year.. and tat's it? luckily he did give me a 3 days mc as requested..
i was a bit disappointed tho during the earlier incident when i ve been called at the payment counter ( FYI one needs to pay RM5 for a folow up appt). the clerk, asweet lady ( whom i think is much much younger than me) asked me whether i have any kad kebajikan, so i asked her back? wat is that kad kebajikan for? she said " iya lah, dgn keadaan keadaan akak ni, akak tak apply kad kebajikan kak?" so iasked her again, do i look like im in need of any kad kebajikan? and before she cud utter back, i quickly told her, "saya keja, lagipun saya rasa tsaya tak perlu kad kebajikan tu, byk lagi org uyg memerlukan nya..."
and yes.. i m so so offended.. apala punya org main tibai jek cakap..
unless she saw me with crutches or i ve been wheeled ke, then she got point to say dat.. but i went there with my two big feets, except for a slight limp, which is nothing compared to those who came there, do i look like i need a kad kebajikan? infact i think i earn more than her.. LOL ( ish riak plak aku)
once i chatted with a paralysed guy onlineand he asked me whether i havs tios green card. iasked him wat is a green card? and he said its a special card for disabled.. i told him, my condition is not tat bad to request for a card and he said y not..
he never saw me actually..and im not trying to deny my condition.. neither fishing for any sympathy
except for my deformed hands, ( which they tot i ve suffered for a stroke, i just let them think i am ) , yes, i admit my mobility is very limited, i mean i cant carry things, cant climb, cant do sport activities, but apart than those, i d be able to do my works..unless for a parking lot.. i think i can manage other things, there r lotsa ppl who r less fortunate than me, and being me, i dun think i need some special attention. I ve difficulties to prove to some aircrew that i m disabled when i want to go in first, now do u think they d believe me if i show them my special card..oohhh im offended again..
maybe i m stubborn and still think that im anotrmal person.. cos im not..
i dunno.. i shud gove it a long tot abt that matter..
*sighing*