Frustration with a capital F

maybe its more of disappointment.. truly disappointed when a person did not do his job well.

In another word, I am totally mad..

2 weeks ago, I asked the person in charge with all these deliveries including mails and documents to send my document consists of an application for a postdoc along with all his certificates and papers. I spent half day to compile all the necessary documents and put in the out tray in the dept office. I put a stick on note telling the PIC to deliver it safely to the Research and Internalization office at level 2.

As i havent heard any news from the office, i ve been looking for the guy whom sent my document and everytime I looked for him in the office, he is either missing in action or went to some other place.

But today, I cant wait any longer, he was nowhere to be seen so I asked for his mobile no instead from another girl in the office. I called him wanting to know to whom did he sent the document previously. He said he just put the document in the counter as no one is around that time.

Priorly, I called the girl in charge with the document at the Research office and she informed that she hasnt received any documents before. She then lookedevery nook and cranny for the document but to no avail.

I later messaged the guy asking him to trace back the document. Since I had class from 2-5 this afternoon, i never got to see him in person. Never thought of checking any phone msg as well

And guess what, i just read the msg, and he told me to reprint the document again because he said ' it is ok to do that"

so, here comes the ugly part..
I feel like banging his head on the wall (if i were there infront of him now).. feel like cursing as well. but my vocabulary is so limited tho.

So i replied his msg- I have no problem with reprinting the document but the fact that I have spent half day to prepare the documents and to compile all the appendices which God Knows, where the hell shall i start to look for them again in my congested superslow pc.. and how should i let the candidate knows that the staff here is so underefficient , he can always lose your documents-

The only thing that I can do now is crying with frustation..

I so detest the people who take for granted of their works.

Enough said.

and i so hate the people who think that they re so superior they can belittle others without mercy.. and if u think u r witty and funny.. i suggest u should use other words to describe yourself, maybe old, and snobbish? or maybe u think u re so good u can act like GOD?

People have feelings and u have none?

Case closed

Oh no.. there is blood all over..

3rd day of eid-ul adha.. am stuck at home, the stove is broken with both of the gas burners kaput. I cooked my chicken soup using a rice cooker yesterday. Had called the handyman, he promised to come this evening.
on a lighter note, I had a quiet eid this year. Called mom and dad in the eid morning, and they were left alone as the younger sister went back to her in laws that day. A colleague invited me to go to her house which is only a distance away from yours truly. I was supposed to go there, yet early in the morning, before the eid prayer, the 2nd elder brother called me asking to meet up. The youngest sister was also availed in KL, thus we decided to gather in the evening. I cancelled my visit to the colleague's thinking that my bro will come early, rite after the jumaat prayer. yet, I had to wait till 5 before he called me ( rolling eyes). Alas, we managed to go to Gardens and my sister's family will be meeting us there. Had dinner at Chillies, with my BIL treated us .. again (rolling eyes, one more time). My bro insisted on paying it separately, but then my BIL eventually succeeded in swiping his CC , to pay everyone's meal. okay, i supposed my bro who should pay for everyone's meal instead of my BIL. (rolling eyes for the 2nd time).
i reached home almost 10 pm, took a quick shower and later,  crashed into bed. heaven..
and it was still heaven to think that i can wake up a bit late for 3 consecutive days.. anyway, yesterday, before i realised that the stove was not working i have already ordered some groceries from the mini market. when that indian guy came to send my supplies, he accidentally dropped a big bottle of grape juice infront the door. so the juice was left on the corridor, created a pool of blood-like liquid on the tiles outside. an hour later, i heard some noises outside my house, and it seemed that the indon cleaner was talking aloud with this one security guard regarding the spilled liquid. From the kitchen window, i could see the scenario outside, the guard was somehow yelling at I-dont know who, and the cleaner came out from the elevator, looking very nervous. Earlier, that indian guy from the mini market covered the damage with the newspaper as he thought the liquid is quite slippery for those who step on it. Not that i know, the cleaner thot it was a pool of blood, and she was very reluctant to clean it. So i yelled from the kitchen yard, that the liquid was actually grape juice. "owh really," she still didnt take my words, so i convinced her by telling that if she really noticed that the color of the liquid was actually purple, and you can smell the sweet grapey smell, of the liquid. hahaha it was a very funny scenario, when the guard later joking that maybe i could serve them the juice instead.
Hmm.. its been very hot these past few days. the good thing is, my laundry are all crispy dried when i hanged them outside. Anyway, it is too hot to walk to the nearest restaurant to have my lunch there.. (remember, i am not able to cook) .
I m having anther appt with both the rheumy and hand surgeon next tuesday. They have confirmed that i m able to undergo a wrist replacement, but still i have to undergo another ct-scan for my wrist. (and why it feels a deja-vu, everytime i mention ct-scan...*winking*)
Just wish me luck okay. I am working again next weekend for the purpose of gaining some cash for the prosthesis :)

The remaining Syawal...

Good err morn-noon.. hehehe. Its almost noon.. and I am at home on saturday noon... doing nothing.. No open house.. no "what's for lunch", no babies wailing, no kids fighting.. yeah.. life is so bliss ( once a while) without any kids to attend on.

Lost count of how many syawal days already. I m in the middle of trying to complete my Syawal fasting. I started last wednesday, so if there isn't any hindrances, I d be ending my 'Puasa 6" this coming Monday. yeahhhh!

yesterday was National independence Day. I didn't wait for the sound of firecrackers at 12 midnite tho, as I was quite tired. During a month of fasting month, I did not manage to cook by myself, yet for this Syawal, I did cook after came back from work. That amazed me then.. hahahah

A beloved teacher during MRSM years passed away yesterday. I was notified on the FB walls written by the school alumni. Although I was not as close as the others who did visit her during her illness, I never forget to du'a for her wellbeing every time after each prayer. This is what Allah has for her. Sooner or later, we , will follow suit. AlFatihah...

New students will start filling in every university next week. A week later, the old students will join them. I am praying hard that Allah gives me the best of health to teach them for the coming semester. I ll be extra bz with the starting and finishing school either. Its been a year since i last conducted those schools. Hope, I still have the same courage for those students..

Family wise, my brother's family has safely arrived in Bahrain. Thou we d still be seeing them on hariraya (hopefully), I ll miss the chaos at his house at KD. Morever, he managed to move to other unfinished house at other area, I think I m gonna miss the house the most. as I won't be waking up to the serene sound of water running in the koi pond, whenever I spent overnite at his

And, believe it or not? I gained 2 kgs after 2 days during did festive. LOL. It took me a months to put off 2 kgs during ramadhan, yet, the weighing scale did a rigtflip on the scale once Syawal started...hence, I was not binge-ing myself last week during the training. We did hv to pay for $80, and some of my colleagues said, we have to eat of $80 worth then. Now as my age is crawling slowly towards the big 5-0, I m developing a notion that we only eat for as our stomach would allow to. I realized I had a small stomach nowadays, ad it can only fill a half plate of rice and one tiny dessert.No more appetizers or whatsoever to me. The stomach must be so grateful to her owner currently as the owner has finally come to her senses:)

Lat but not least, Happy Independence Day..

Btw, This is my little nephew, Dariss. he was the centre of attraction during last eid.. everyone was in awed of his cute face.. Cute. rite?

Awaiting Ramadhan

I am having cold right now, as saying it as 'flu' sounds so serious to me. I was boasting to my SIL the other day that I seldom catch cold. The last one i got it was like 3-4 years ago. It was a bad one, i lost my voice for a few days, and I couldn't smell anything for many years due to that LOL! See, I told you, I am very worried once i caught the cold, as some disaster like losing one of your senses might happen.. again Oh, btw the siblings has a bbq gathering last weekend. Yours truly was the one who suddenly came out with the idea. It actually occurred to me that my elder bro and his family, will be coming back for good the week after. So i was suggesting maybe we can hold a potluck and 'makan-makan' at one of the sibling's house. As we cannot make it this weekend since another brother will start working in Bahrain at that time. so we decided to make it last weekend, and seemed like the ones that we should entertain for are still not availed at that time...but then... owh well.. we had a good time thou, the rest of the siblings were in KL last weekend. I have just realized that I have never scrutinized people, i mean for their appearances . We had a meeting with a Kazakhstanis ( not sure whether it is pronounced correctly)yesterday, and my boss who was in the meeting with me yesterday, was narrating it in the dept meeting this morning. She was telling the dept members that she met a brown eyed professor the day before, ... and i could not remember whether his eyes are brown or not. She was asking me, "he do have brown eyes, right? Miss Crooked?".. and I was like... " err.. i know he's like a korean, but i cannot remember the color of his eyes".. How am i supposed to check whether his eyes are brown or not as we were like a few feet away from him..Hmm.. maybe its about time that I should check the power of my reading glasses again ... :) Ramadhan is coming in less than 2 weeks. I am not planning to cook for the iftar. It will be too energy wasting for me. I have decided to ask for food delivery during the months. Found one website, which deliver food to people like me LOL. Anyway, I still have to cook on weekends because the food delivery is only on weekdays. OwH, never mind, I can always survive on bread and crackers on weekend Since the meeting with that Kazkhstan Professor, I was thinking on doing my sabbatical in that country. Just found out that, there is a direct flight from KUL-Astana. Am impressed with the techniques that they used for early cancer detection. I mean, I would never have the gut to check my blood sample and then found out that I do have cancer, even though I haven't had the tiniest symptoms yet. The professor said that it can be detected as early as 36 months before the development of tumor. Waaaa can't even imagine that, yet it will be beneficial for those people with family history of cancer... On lighter note, I am happier now, even thigh I still have to be careful with whatever things that might happen in the future, yet I am not going to make the same mistake once again, If I did, that will be a choice. Cant wait for the Ramadhan. aHope it won't be the last one for me...

Back to reality

Time flies so fast...*sighing*. I was in my hometown last week.. did a slow marathon while exploring from the klia entrance to the boarding gate..quite tiring for a person who couldn't even wiggle her both feet last year. While saddling a so so knapsack onto my shoulder, i prayed silently tat the floor is not too slippery for me to walk on..cant risk of accidentally fallen down with my current condition.. heeeee I was up since 4.30 am on last saturday morning so that i would be able to save my breath in catching the early flight to KL. I was way too early infact that I have to wait while listen to someone talking on the phone asking the person on the other side of the phone number of Sydney Harbor police station *giggling*.. Yeah, I can't help but to admire that person's spectacular Australian accent I was everywhere on the prioritized seats for disabled (I am, indeed) but when the people throw some funny looks at me, I felt a bit wary then. Let alone, it was hard for me to stand up from the seat as I usually need space on my won todo that without people staring at me.. In certain situations, with a lowered seat, I need to make a first few attempts before i can really able to stand up. It was quite discomforting then, when this one foreign guy was sitting too close to me, while staring at his iPad screen. " hey, can't u just shift yr ass 1 m away from me , so that I could move my ass up without creating embarrassment, hehehe" tailor that i went for the past ... I was at KB airport an hour later, recognize a neighbor WHen she talked beside me, alas she did not recognize me at first... The vacation started when i went straight to textile store to purchase a few materials for my rays garments.. I know, it still too early to talk about it, but the tailor i went for the past 30 years won't take any order once the ramadhan begins... I have to be fast, as I did not celebrate rays last year.. another reason why i have to 'rays sakan' this year :) Had Father day's meal later at Kheng Som..There was no one else around except the three of us.. Kota Bharu was too hot at the time of the year.. with that I yearned of my room back in Kajang... i was even sweating even tho the fan was put on the maximum at nite.. Frankly speaking, I did not give money every month to my mom, but when i was back home, I would just gibe them money, without trying to offend them. I definitely know that they would never ask it from their cut to make you happy while you are still aliveildren.. but that's the only way to display my affections towards them.. All the money in my saving will not worth their loves towards me... Mom even asked me, when i put some notes into her palms.."cutup ke duit tu sampai nak bagi ma (do you have enough that you can even give it to me)" I can't even answer her as my eyes started to blur with tears, but what I wanted to say was"the money is nothing compared to my love to you, I just want to make you happy while you are still alive, all those money won't replace your love", ... but then, i refused to create such a melodrama at that time.. lol.. when i hand some more notes to bak, i told him 'this is for your iced tea treat, and with these notes, u can drink 300 glasses of iced tea..".. okay, I m not being practical... lol I have become very emotional lately, reading someone;s father stories can make me wept gallons of tears.. watching a dog died on tv, i ll show up with swollen eyes next day..i also cried when i watched happy scene, and it is even worst watching sad scenes.. I guess i have to stop moping over unreal things..Its not good for your health anyway:) ........I know i will get my eyes swollen again tomorroW...but never mind then.. its saturday tomorrow... horrayyy!

Its the trendy "D' in name-thingy

Almost a decade ago, there's a drama swasta on tv with Elly Mazlein starred in it and Ako Mustafa as the hero. I hardly remember the story, but I do remember Ako Mustapha's character as Dr Rayyan. Later, lotsa mommies name their sons as Rayyan. Rayyan Iskandar or Rayyan Hariz (that is my sister's second son, and he named her son, Rayyan before the beginning of the drama.
talk about 'trendy' names. Later, there are too many gals are named as Batrisya or Qistina. That was the 'in' names at that time. And now, the "D' names started to conquer . Well, Daniel or Danish was the 'in' names a few years ago. And then, someone I know, named her 3sons as Dayyan, Darwish and Darwood.. How about that? and later my sister followed suit. She named her 3 sons as Daniel, Dani and the latest one, Dariss. Those are kewl names, dude! LOL I guess most of the "D" names are all taken. I guess those are sophisticated names for boys. Later, there will be many more little boys named with an initial D. Albeit, those names have their meaning in arabic. Ustaz Don Daniyal for instance. Isn't that a kewl name as well? hehehe
On another note, I m getting better each day. I have stopped using my wheel chair and utilized my cane instead . Instead of leaving all your things scattered all over the floor, I left my wheelchair everywhere hahaha. In fact i asked my maid not to move it, which is in front of the tv.
am addicted with Korean drama, Ojakgyo brothers these days.
owh.. thats all. Tata peepss

What make cupcakes so heavenly..

Well, its nothing to do with this post tho.. its a quote that i heard a few minutes ago from Rachel Alleb: bake in astro. Frankly speaking, i am not so into pastries, especially sweet ones.. Cupcakes, red velvet albeit any cakes/cheese cakes, cookies are never my forte..Chocolate cakes is a no no too.. whenever my sis baked those during hariraya, i never feel like tasting it... somehow those sweet cakes would not adapt with my 'weird' taste bud tho. hehehe... so if people are crazy with the so 'in' red velvet la,or macaroon la, or cup cakes la, i d opt for those traditional ones like 'sponge' cake. not sure what others call, maybe kek sarang semut kot, the ones which do not use margarine/butter inside. That was one traditional cake, because I used to eat it (at that time, i did no like the taste) many many years ago, when my late grandma was still alive. Nowadays, kek tu ada balk kan.. and it is quite expensive tho from what my mom said, the ingredients to bake it is so cheap..( but being me, I d never made an attempt to learn baking hahaha. Owh, what's the use of learning when u d never feel like eating it.. It'd be such a waste of time and energy mahhh..
There is another traditional cake that I love but people rarely bake it nowadays. Not sure what the KLians call it but me, the kelantanese name it as kuih ambong or apom. That is considered a hard work if u do have a suitable cooking tools, macam the way we make kuih baulu.. It neither needs any butter.. all u have to do is whip the egg with sugar till it becomes so fluffy. add a tablespoon of vanilla essence, add some artificial coloring as well and steam it. Then you will get one fluff among yg sangat sedap dan tidak muak langsung. When i was little, my mom used to bake it during hariraya, and the only cake that mom baked during that time is marble cake. I still love marble cake, in fact I love all plain cakes, the same thing goes to cookies. i still crave for plain raya cookies, yang kita tak bubuh apa2 except for some custard , tepung gandum and some colorings. However, it'd difficult to find em during present raya as people are likely to serve fashionable cookies cam almond london la, mama kerrys la , just naming a few.
I am not into cheese cakes either hahaha. anyway, I can have tiramisu in small portions .. i m suffering from cheesy-syndrome.. once i ate 2 pieces of cheese cakes and that made me a diarhheal one.. hahahaha.. imagine u r not able to stand yr nature call in the middle of yr car trip and to find a decent toilet during the trip was a torturous one... I ve never eaten big portions of cheese cakes afterwards ..
On another store, Beto Kusyairi is so 'in' nowadays. We can watch him on tv like a few times a week. He starred in every drama swasta/cerekarama nowadays. in every channel too..owh he's not a hunk like adyputra or aaron aziz, but he has the talent of making his characters come to live. such a talented actor, he is..love to watch him on tv :). he was in last nite cerekarama as well with Nora Danish. I seldom watch tv at nite tho...but it will be an exception when they put my favorites in the drama.. that is something that i d not be able to resist.. but then it'd be rare of me to stay up till midnite.. normally, after 10 i am already safe and soundly asleep
okk.. end of story.. till next time peeps :)

Things that will make u smile

Sometimes... there are things that u may take for granted...
things that for an unknown reason will make u smile instantly.. sincerely..
I always have things for those...
like...
when you saw a group of young daddies chatting at the playground...
..or seeing some toddlers playing all by themselves...
those simple things will actually make u smile...without u realizing it